2014 has come to an end....LET'S RING IN 2015!!

HOLA MY LITTLE BLOG!! who knew it would be MONTHS since i posted something. life has come speeding by and it has been a whirlwind of a year!!! really, it feels like i have been in a FOG this year...could be my FIBRO and what they call FIBRO FOG, i guess any excuse i will take it! right?

Well, this year my boys turned ALEX 12, MATTHEW 10 and JOSHUA 7....these boys keep growing and growing and THANK YOU GOD they do! who knew that i would have such amazing boys and that they are just so wonderful and loving....they have grown into such beautiful and loving boys...they show us each day how much they know that they are LOVED by us their parents and how much we want them to know GOD'S LOVE....that HE is the most important person in the world and that they should love and honor him every moment of their lives...

This year we have had so many things happen to us. we bought a new BOAT for our family...this boat we call MATTHEW's boat because it is a PONTOON and that gives him the ROOM to roam around the boat so that he can go on the water. he had not been able to be on the water in our other smaller boat because he had no where to go. but now with this bigger boat, he is more comfy and he LOVES being back on the water!! we also love being able to take more family out on the boat with us.



MATT got his new KAYE WALKER and he has started to do his walking and getting stronger and doing SOOO GOOD! we are so proud of all his new accomplishments! He has been walking to and from the bathroom and also up and down the stairs....soooo proud of him and how much better he is getting on walking!! <3

EASTER 2014 was really a nice family time with so many people there joining us at our home. The kids enjoyed being there and having all their cousins there to crack cascarones on each other! The food was amazing and all the goodies you just can't beat!!



Matthew started in a BASEBALL LEAGUE called the MIRACLE LEAGUE OF SAN ANTONIO....he was on the DODGERS team and boy, he LOVES it soooooo much! he has such a good time hitting home runs and being on his team....he played 2 seasons...the spring and the fall and he always gets so happy and excited when we pull into the parking lot....such a HAPPY BOY!! GO DODGERS!!






ALEX AND JOSH have also started their 3rd year of CYO BASEBALL THRU PRINCE OF PEACE! This will be Alex's last year playing baseball...this year he was with the ROYAL TITAN'S....and Josh was with the PADRES...and it was the first time he was with an all male team!! no more T-BALL for him!!! He's in coaches pitch and he did so well this year! Both boys did amazing! so proud of both of them!!






This year, we ended up going to GREAT WOLF LODGE for our summer vacation. we had soon much fun and soon enjoyed being with our little family, splashing around and just getting wet. what memories our boys will have of this time with each other.....they are just young for a little while and then they grow up and don't want to be with us anymore, so we have to enjoy. Life is amazing and we have been so happy that GOD has granted us each other...

Towards the end of this year, we have continued to be BLESSED with good health....ALL OF US, THANK YOU JESUS!! Matt has done amazing and we thank Him everyday for every moment...just watching all of us growing and getting healthy and happy is amazing....

So, as we closed 2014 and are now in 2015, we can only PRAY that we continue to grow and give THANKS to GOD for all the blessings in our life and Pray we have continued GOOD HEALTH and happiness...in HIM!!! BLESSING TO ALL!

GOODBYE 2012....HAPPY 2013!!!

WOW...2013 CAME AND WENT IN A FLASH!!!! hard to believe that a whole year went by soooo quickly!! my cousin and i last night were talking about ONE WORD that would describe 2012 and then one word we WANT to describe 2013...i came up with for 2012...DAZED....for 2013...it's a double edge word=BLESSED/FAITH...i'll explain each one...
FOR 2012...the year of MANY ups and downs....for me DAZED is the word of the year because sooooo much happened to me personally in that year...and i don't know if it was because of my pain medication or just everything personally that was happening to me that i was constantly in a DAZE...things that i normally did such as keep up with matthew's appts, meds, numerous phone calls that i NEED to make and just generally all the stuff that comes with having a special needs little guy i was putting off, FORGETTING (a BIG no-no) and just NOT DOING THEM...it was crazy when BEFORE i had been soooo organized, had my book with aaaallllll my notes and such and this year....uh...not so much!! i can honestly say, i have NO RECORD of names i have spoken to when calling for important things or any NOTES other than those on little bits of papers all over the house that i know i can't put together!!! :( so not MEEEE!!! AND THEN with the homeschooling front...i have taken such a BACK SEAT to it and pretty much let ALEX do what he needs to do and nothing else...we have been soooooo busy with appts for matthew, appts for ME, and playdates/extra classes for ALEX that we are constantly on the GO GO GOOOO!!! it's crazy!! but this year has been full of BLESSINGS as i CONSTATLY say about my life...even with all the crazy and dazed feeling, i STILL KNOW and FEEL like i am BLESSED!!! GOD IS SOOOO GOOD and has ALWAYS been in me, with me... He is at the START of me and everyday is such a BLESSING no matter what the day brings...i feel like no matter what, because i have GOD in my life, it will be a BLESSED DAY!!!! :)

this year, my children, THANK YOU GOD, have grown sooooooo much!!! my ALEX turned 10 this year (double digits, baby!) and he is now in 5th grade! he is a couple of inches shorter than me and keeps getting BIGGER!! he is sooooooo smart!! REALLY not an exaggeration or mommy prejudice! :) he has such an INCREDIBLE mind and such an AMAZING memory! he can recall things that i don't even remember and he has to remind us about it. and wowowowowow, on his schooling...watching him figure out all his subjects and KNOW how to do it and also, impressing the HECK out of us when a cousin 2 years older than him, bringing over some HOMEWORK for school (math) and the cousin was having a problem and didn't understand the math and alex coming over, casually looking it over in 2 secs, KNOWING THE ANSWER and answering CORRECTLY!!! crazy! and him HELPING that cousin with the rest of his work! and then same with other subjects he had brought over!! MY BIG BOY!!!! and he started CYO BASEBALL this year with our church and watching him GROW from NEVER having played ANY sport before to joining a team that was ESTABLISHED, intergrating himself and really coming from never played baseball (batted/catching balls/RUNNING/throwing balls, etc) to after the season, LOVING it and really knowing how to PLAY the game and do everything he NEEDED to do without being scared!!! my, how he has GROWN!!! and in his FAITH, he is AMAZING!! he LOVES GOD and he probably knows MORE about the bible and our FAITH than james and i combined!! so proud of our little boy!!

and then there is MATTHEW....he turned 8 this year...another miracle in our life!! wowow...time has FLOWN with this little boy too..watching him get BIGGER, is just so amazing and we MARVEL at everything he has DONE and is LEARNING!!! this year, he made his FIRST COMMUNION!!! wooohooo! we are sooo proud of him and what an ACCOMPLISHMENT that is! and he is now in 3rd grade and is doing WELL with his amazing teacher. unfortunately, this year has brought FUSTRATION to him which in turns causes him to lash out sometimes because we DON'T UNDERSTAND!!! :( he does not do it often but he gets sooo frustrated! poor guy! can't wait and i PRAY he will either learn to talk or sign or use his TALKER! :) he has taken off on EATING like a champ orally and has gained weight. he KNOWS HOW TO SPELL HIS NAME PHONICALLY and if you give him the letters, he can spell it that way too! he is also learning to READ and knows all his ABC, NUMBERS, PHONICS, SHAPES, OBJECTS, ETC and we are just crazy proud of all he has done!! on the flip side, HEALTH WISE, it has been an UP AND DOWN YEAR...seizure wise, it was 27.5 MONTHS without seizures until dec 9th when he had one at 0430 and lasted for at least 20 mins...so, our count down is back down to 1....his LUNGS have been a BIG PROBLEM this year with CONSTANT illness, wheezing, junky, on crazy amounts of STEROIDS, TREATMENTS, antibiotics, doctors appts, etc ALLLLL YEAR LONG!! :( NOT a good year for his health...he is doing well with his CPAP, and through all the illness, he is STILL OUR HAPPY BOY!!! so proud of him!

and our SURPRISE BLESSING JOSHUA...he turned 5 this year and it has been a BLESSED year for him!! he is such a HAPPY boy and full of life and mischief! we were sooooo BLESSED that he was our little surprise. he is our BABY and just watching him grow up is bittersweet because we know there will be no more after him!! :( even though i wanted another little one but GOD has other plans and that is ok. but he is our little sports guy. he LOVES to be playing ball...this year, he started CYO BASKETBALL and he was soooo good!! he is still so good and one of the better players! :) and then he also played CYO BASEBALL T-BALL!! awwww....watching him out there is such a JOY!! :) AND this year he is in KINDERGARDEN!! and he is learning all his phonics and such and is doing REALLY good in his schooling....soooo proud of this little guy!!!

James is doing GREAT!!! he has a GREAT position at work and his working sooooo hard and doing SOOOO GOOD!! we are so proud of all the hard work he does for our family! he is now also a COACH for CYO sports so he is active with the boys and their practices and games...he is in his ELEMENT with all of them and enjoys being out there with the boys and the KIDS! it's been a crazy year for all the traveling and away time the military has had him doing this year....and next year promises more of the same but it is ALLLLLL for PROMOTION as he makes his way to E-8!!! so we will take that!! he soooo deserves all of that and MORE because he is one of the BEST EMPLOYEES the military has and that is not just a PROUD WIFE talking either!! :) he has gotten a lot of recognition from his superiors and we are really just soooo proud of him!!! and this year HE EARNED HIS 20 YEARS OF MILITARY SERVICE FOR OUR GREAT COUNTRY!!! wowowowowowow....what an ACCOMPLISHMENT!! again, so proud of him!! unfortunately, it is not ACTIVE years so we still have a little over 8 years left to reach 20 YEARS ACTIVE DUTY FULL RETIREMENT years!! and that is what he is working for....we PRAY that the US ARMY continue to keep him employed!! we are SOOOOOO BLESSED to be ACTIVE DUTY MILITARY!!! THANK YOU GOD!!!

AS FOR MEEEEEE....hmmmmmmm...it has been as always a BLESSED YEAR!!! this year, my pain in my arm had unfortunately gotten WORST...sooo bad that i couldn't even shake hands, play wii or any other activities that required me to use my right arm WITHOUT EXTREME PAIN!!! i had complained to my DOCTOR (dx TENNIS ELBOW (for the 5+ year), i had complained to my rheumitologist also and gotten a STEROID SHOT and told it was TENNIS ELBOY (for the 2+ year) and put BACK into PHYSICAL THERAPY (JAN 2012)...and during my evaluation the physical therapist found a BALL on my forearm and told me that that didn't feel right and i needed to get an MRI....and what a LIFE SAVER THAT WAS!!! :) because, after FINALLY getting an MRI (IN APRIL), it was found that i had a TUMOR and was IMMEDIATELY s (within 4 days) was being seen at the ORTHOPEDIC ONCOLOGY DEPARTMENT AT SAMMC!!! :( yep, they didn't know what type of tumor but they felt that it COULD BE CANCER....and ultimately IT WAS SYNOVIAL SARCOMA===CANCER....i really never thought i would ever have that DX but there it was....and the doctor was concerned enough that he needed it out NOW....so on JULY 31ST, 2012, it was roomed and thru the GRACE OF GOD, because of HIS BLESSINGS, they were able to get the WHOLE THING OUT due to the MIRACLE that it was ENCAPSULATED so i didn't have to have CHEMOTHERAPY/RADIATION!!! PRAISE GOD! but now, i have to have PET SCANS every 3 months and see the doctor ever 3 months for 2 years and then move on 2 twice a year for 3 years then yearly for the rest of my life!! :( and now i know WHY we could not get PREGNANT again even when it was timed right on etc....GOD HAD OTHER PLANS!! :) so, again, BLESSING BLESSING BLESSINGS!!! other than that, just a regular crazy, DAZED YEAR!!!

AND FOR THIS YEAR, 2013 my word(s) of the year would be FAITH/BLESSED....WHY 2? BECAUSE I HAVE FAITH, I AM BLESSED.....I AM BLESSED TO HAVE FAITH!! GOD will be utmost in my life and MY FAITH will be front and center. i pray i will learn more about GOD, learn more ABOUT MY FAITH and just get closer to that which has LOVED ME UNCONDITIONALLY, that has BLESSED ME AND MY FAMILY, that who has GIVEN ME SO MANY REASONS TO BE HAPPY!!!!! and that would be GOD! i am going to devote this year and ALWAYS to learning more about GOD and about my faith....I LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM!!!

sooooo, that is it....2012 is gone and 2013 is here...i will plan to make this year a BLESSED year and a YEAR OF FAITH....this year will GOD WILLING bring a new blessing in my brothers life.....a BABY!!!! and we will GOD WILLING be going to see her and my family and i will be traveling to HAWAII IN MAY!!! WOOOHOOOO!!! yes, all 5 of us!! wowowowowow....we will keep trucking along and just enjoying life, loving my family!!!

GOD'S BLESSINGS TO EVERYONE AND FOR THE YEAR TO COME!!!! love ya'll!!!

SURGERY DAY.......

so, today is the DAY...i am of course right now writing from my memory because after i had the surgery, i lost the use of my right arm for about 7 days and even today (8/7/12), i can't do much and it is hurting me a LITTLE BIT to type this but i will SLOWLY try to finish and get caught up on my blogging!!


sooo, the day started with getting up early and getting ready in some comfy clothes and no food or drinks since midnight...i COMPLETELY forgot about my paralyzed tummy and that i SHOULD have tried to empty it a couple of days BEFORE HAND....oh well, too late now! so, my MIL came over and will be staying with the boys for me and of course matts nurse will be taking care of him...honestly felt surreal because i was not apprehensive or upset or worried or ANYTHING...it just felt like another normal day! i was not even NERVOUS!!!! SO, james and i left the house about 0730 and headed over to the medical center area to get ready...it was AWESOME having james there...i knew that he was going to have to take a lot of the load for at LEAST couple of days until i was back on my feet but i didn't feel bad and i KNEW that he could do it!! i remember when i have been on my own with my 3 kids when james was deployed to IRAQ and every time that he has to leave for duty for a couple of days-weeks...so i KNOW if i can do it, so can HE!!

soooo, we get there and head up to the front desk and as i am getting my paperwork, my phone rings and i step away to answer because the number looks familiar and as i am talking to the lady, james is like pointing to the lady with her back to me at the desk who is CALLING AND TALKING TO ME ON THE PHONE!! HAHAHAHAHA...pretty funny stuff!! we all laughed about it! so, i finish my paperwork and with in 15 mins, we was taken back and i was told to remove everything and put on my gown/hat etc...unfortunatly, it NEVER fails every time that i have a surgery it almost NEVER fails that AF ARRIVES!! GRRRR...anyway, TMI...so, i laid down and just chit chatted with james and the nurse and answered tons of questions and signed some forms...she started an IV on me (after blowing one attempted on my left inner forearm) she started one on OLD FAITHFUL which is my left hand! :) there are soooo many scars there from the numerous IV's i have had....anyway, the resident came in, then the DR and then the anesthesiologist...we all had tons of questions on what to expect...he marked my right arm and showed me more or less how big the cut was going to be...WOWOWOWOW...i didn't know it was going to be that BIG! about 3-4 inches...pretty long..oh well!! i am getting ready to have enough scars to compete with matthews scars BUT HIS ARE WAY COOLER!! ;-) anyway, after james and i blessed each other, they put some comfy meds in my IV and off i went!! wowow, it didn't take but a minute!!!!

so, i wake up with my arm in a HUGE cast looking thing....and in PAIN...they end up giving me the MOST MORPHINE they could and i still would not get rid of the pain, then they started me on the stronger stuff and it took a couple more shots of that before FINALLY had the pain under control. i explained it was probably because i took pain meds daily that it was not working for me...they agreed! anyway, i was off the bed and in a recliner with in 30 mins of waking up and OUT THE DOOR within about another 30 mins!! crazy how quick they get you in and out!! the surgery lasted about 1 1/2 hours long, 45 asleep in recovery and then another 45-1 hour after waking up out the door! ********THEY TOOK OUT MY TUMOR (SYNOVIAL SARCOMA) WHICH WAS ENCASED, AND THERE WAS A NERVE ON TOP OF THE TUMOR (WHICH EXPLAINED MY EXTREME PAIN THAT I HAVE BEEN HAVING AND ALSO WHEN I HIT IT OR WHEN MY NERVE STARTED FIRING) IT MENT I WAS GOING TO BE NUMB IN THAT ARE (WHICH IS FINE WITH ME BECAUSE AFTER ALL THE PAIN I HAVE HAD, I DEFINETLY NEEDED THE RELIEF WITH THAT...THEN AFTER THEY TOOK THE TUMOR OUT, HE FOUND SOME MORE SUSPICIOUS LOOKING STUFF AND HE REMOVED THAT TOO ALONG WITH SOME HEALTHY TISSUE TO GET IT BIOPSED....THEY STILL DONT' KNOW IF I WILL HAVE CHEMO/RADIATION THERAPY AFTERWARDS...ONCE THEY GET THE RESULTS, THEY WILL HAVE A ROUND HOUSE MEETING AND TALK ABOUT OPTIONS WITH ALL THESE ONCOLOGIST AND OTHER DRS, THEN WHEN I GO FOR MY FOLLOW UP MEETING ON THE 13TH, I WILL HOPEFULLY GET THE RESULTS THERE*********

anyway, back to me, as we leave the parking garage, i started feeling sick ended up tossing up (or my interpretation of it since i can't really do it) and did it again when i got home a couple of times...crazy!! after that i just chilled on my couch with my arm up and just trying to keep ahead of the pain and the SWELLING on my hand...as long as i kept my arm up, it kept the swelling down a bit...after that, i just layer down for a bit and relaxed...THANK YOU GOD FOR A GREAT SURGERY DAY!!!!!

getting ready for my surgery tomorrow...

and i am FINE...i got the call that i had to be at the surgery place by 0815ish and i am READY...i don't know what is going happen, how much it is going to hurt or how it is going to feel ANYTHING but i am just ready to get this part of my life STARTED so that it can be FINISHED GOD WILLING....i have had sooooo many people praying for me and i have felt soooo BLESSED about this because i feel such LOVE AND COMFORT from those wonderful people all around the world!! i have been BLESSED!!!! i have done nothing really to get ready...i have not let this upcoming surgery really affect my everyday life....i have just continued to live my life to the fullest and just ready for whatever is to come....

SUMMER VACATION 2012

WOOOOHOOOOO!! GONZALEZ VACATION IS OFFICIALLY STARTED! :) dad has a week off work and we are going to make the mOST of our time as a family!!! we are starting our vacation at the WONDERFUL GREAT WOLF LODGE IN GRAPEVINE TEXAS! i have heard sooo much about this place from other friends that have come out here so i thought since our RV is out of commission for a bit, we would do some traveling in our car....so i BOOKED us a 2 night stay at the LODGE july 22-24....the boys and us are sooo excited and we can't WAIT for it to start. I NEEDED this time with my family because on the 31st, with my surgery to remove the cancer tumor out of my arm, i knew that for a while afterwards, i would not be able to do much...this week is going to be our get away, and my time to just relax...we are starting to pack our MILLION and one things of STUFF and get everything ready. there is always sooooo much to pack because with 3 boys, stuff gets CRAZY! the only thing is that there are NO TOYS this time...just stuff. i figured that they would not have down time with there being a INDOOR WATER PARK there, i figured we would be TIRED by the end of each night....soooo, HERE GOES OUR VACATION!!

IT'S THERE...

you know, when you KNOW something is THERE, it kinda takes over that THING! KNOWING that there is a CANCEROUS TUMOR there on my forearm, well, i am GUARDING it more than usual and i am TOTALLY in tune with my forearm!! and of course, it seems like there is a magnet right on my arm so that anytime something goes by it, be it person or object, it never fails, it gets BUMPED which is VERY painful already!! oh well...and of course i just KNOW it is there...

i think about AFTER i have the surgery...how am i going to put my hair up, how i am going to do something as easy as clip on my bra, put my clothes on, etc...you never think too much about that but really, HOW am i going to do that?!?!? i just know it is going to BE PAINFUL!!! AT LEAST, i ALREADY drive with my LEFT HAND since my right arm has been in soooo much pain FOR EVER that i have had to learn to only drive with my left hand so i think THAT part will have come in handy!!

PET SCAN DONE...some thoughts....

WELL, today at 1330, i got my scan done at SAMMC...it wasn't too bad but if u turn off all the lights, i might GLOW!! :) i had to get an IV with the RADIOACTIVE injection, sit for 90 minutes and then have the scan with some more CONTRAST and that is it!! start the whole processw at 1400 and finished by 1630...poor hubby had to wait for me...

i have had such AMAZING support from everyone near and far and i THANK GOD for all my family and firends that have reached out to us during this time in prayer, emails, calls, FB POST etc...i am ever soooooo BLESSED to have so many people that are praying for me and my family. when matthew was born, all we asked for is PRAYERS and I KNOW that that was one of the reasons he is here today....i have such FAITH in GOD that all will be well and that this is GOD'S PLAN and His plan is PERFECT! i have been calm about it and just going about my normal everyday life....i just know that all IS WELL...i have faith in GOD and i have faith that everything is happening EXACTLY how it is suppose to happen. back in the day (8years ago)i had so much FAITH, LOVE AND WONDER in GOD and all He was doing for us in our life at that time...with the birth of our precious son MATTHEW and everything he went thru, our faith was STRONG IN GOD...we knew that NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENED, it was going to be OK because everything was as GOD wanted it to be.....i gave my son up TO GOD during those days (and everyday) and that is what i have done with this diaseas...GOD IS SOOOO GOD and i know that all will be well! i thnk that i am sooooo LUCK AND BLESSED that i have this FAITH in MY GOD because THAT is the reason that i am doing so well with this shocking news of CANCER!!! i really have been calm and just ready to get started...i am soooo BLESSED because i have SEEN the other side of what i am going thru and how without FAITH some wonderful people dont do well...and i am doing well!!1 :) i sit here today, yesterday and wed with a SMILE on my face, no tears and just a sense of PEACE AND CALMNESS in my mind, heart and soul...life is BEAUTIFUL...GOD IS BEAUTIFUL and i know that i am goign to be ok!!! i look around me at my life and i SEE and i KNOW what a BLESSING that has been given to me and my family from GOD!!! and GOD has always been near me holding me and my family in HIS hands!!! GOD IS SOOOO GOOD!!!

sooo, i know i had posted that we had moved up the surgery to the 24th for the TUMOR removal BUT i have decided to leave it to the 31st because we were unable to move the DATES that we had chosen for out vacation trip to the GREAT WOLF LODGE during that same time...i asked the dr if it was OK to hold out for that extra week and he told me that 7 DAYS would not make a difference!! i did not want to disappoint the boys with canceling the trip...we have all been looking forward to this time and NOW MORE THAN EVER, i think we need this time away as a family before i have my surgery and the possibility of possible CHEMO/RADIATION....i didn't know what my life held in store and i wanted my family to ahve some WONDERFUL memories before we started on our journey!! :) sooooo we are gettign READY FOR OUR TRIP!! WOOOHOOO!!

sooo, i will be blogging about what is going on in my life more so again. i have so much to SAY and sooo much to write about...and more than ANYTHING i want to always remind everyone that GOD IS GOOOD, ALL THE TIME!! AND ALL THE TIME, GOD IS GOOD!!!!!

GOD'S BLESSING EVERYONE!!!

SYNOVIAL SARCOMA.....

ok...wowow....that is the diagnosis i JUST got from my ORTHOPEDICS ONCOLOGIST...we had an appt on july 5th and he said that he was very certain that it was NOT cancer and although he thought that the BIOPSY that was done was INCONCLUSIVE, he felt that it was NOT cancer since i had had it for over 5 years, he felt that it PROBABLY was NOT cancer but that we had to get it out...i was kinda upset at him because he said that it PROBABLY would not hurt and PROBABLY not help with the PAIN and that it should all be ok...i told him that i though i was on a nerve?! and he said he didn't think that at all...i told him that we shall see....

SOOOOO, AT 1600, the dr called me to let e know that he had shown HIS pathologist the biopsy and the pathologist said that it didn't look right so she decided to test it using a certain DYE TEST and he said it was very simple test...inject the cells and if they 'TURNED' it was POSITIVE...if it didn't, it was NEGATIVE...he said it turned IMMEDIATELY! so, he called me to let me know that instead of NO CANCER...i have been diagnosed with SYNOVIAL SARCOMA...and it is an aggressive type of cancer...sooooo, i WAS scheduled for surgery on the 31st to get it removed...now it has been moved up to the 24th AND i am having a PET SCAN to see if there is any more cancer anywhere else in my body....

soooo, am i ok with this? am i in shock? no,i am not in shock and i am as ok as i can be.... i had actually had a conversation with a friend TODAY about this particular subject that i was going to have a SERIOUS conversation with the surgeon to let him know not to be SURPRISED if it turned out to be MORE than the simple thing he was thinking and that it WAS ON THE NERVE not like he said he thought it was NOT....funny, huh? i guess GOD was giving me a gentle hint on this!! :)

sooo, GOD IS SOOOO GOD because while on the phone with me, he texted my other ortho oncologist at SAMMC to see how soon i could get my PET SCAN and i said that i would be surprised if i got it really soon, so he said he would text him to let him know what was going on....i hung up with the dr and within 15 MINUTES, the dr at SAMMC CALLS ME and said to come on in TOMORROW AT 0730 FOR A PET TEST!!!!!!!!! wowowowow, GOD IS SOOO GOOD! i have really been soooo blessed that things have really run smoothly with all of this and no real wait time with any of this...he also said that i should go have a 'punching session at all the military drs/bases' that had diagnosised me for that last 5+ years with TENNIS ELBOW and that i could start with HIM TOMORROW and it would be ok to give him a punch!!! such a good man....

soooo, any prayers or thought would be GREATLY APPRECIATED!! tomorrow, i have the PET SCAN AND I AM PRAYING AND ASKING FOR PRAYERS that there is no OTHER cancer spread thru my body....

I KNOW GOD IS GOOD AND HE IS HERE WITH ME AND MY FAMILY AND HE WILL SEE ME THRU!!! HE ALONG WITH ALL OF MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS IN PRAYER ARE WHAT WILL JUST BRING ME THRU THIS TIME AS HE HAS SEEN ME THRU MY LIFE!! THANK YOU GOD FOR ALWAYS BEING BY MY SIDE!!!

NOT CANCER!!!!

THANK YOU GOD, i got the call from the PA from the ORTHOPEDIC ONCOLOGIST to let me know that they got the results from my BIOPSY OF MY FOREARM and it was NOT CANCER!!! WOWOWOWOWOWOW!! sooo thankful and sooo happy!! BUT i DO have a TUMOR and it is called a PERINEUROMA and i will have to have it removed. so, next week, they are going to have a ROUNDHOUSE MEETING with the ortho dr and all the other drs involved in my care and then they are ALL going over to the UNIVERSITY hospital to meet with the NERVE TUMOR DOCTORS there to let them see my case and see how they are going to achieve this. the PA told me that it is very delicate because they are going to try not to have me lose SENSATION in the arm or FUNCTION of the arm because of where the tumor is!!!! YIKES! so, i am to call the PA again on tuesday to find out what was said and where i am going from here. i am just SOOO HAPPY that SOMETHING i finally going to get DONE to my arm! it has hurt sooooo bad like for over 5 years and it has progressively gotten WORST so that it affects my everyday LIFE!! SO i am happy to get a move on here....but THANK YOU GOD first and for most because it is NOT CANCER!!! WOOOHOOO!! :)

today was such a BLESSING!!

GOD IS GOOD!!!! today, a beautiful sister of mine invited me to a prayer group that met today....she had emailed me earlier this week and i was unsure if i could make it but like always, THE LORD showed me and told me to go. and it was BEAUTIFUL!!! it was soooo uplifting.....i am EVER so thankful to those ladies and i feel so spiritually RESTORED! i was anointed and prayed over and it felt AMAZING...i felt so hot when they were praying over me and then when she started to talk, bless, open herself TO me....i started to cry...i have so much FAITH that everything will be ok with my arm because i KNOW GOD is here and that he is with me....but what came out was that i DID have fears...they were hidden and they were not of GOD...there was worry about WHAT was going to happen and there was worry that if IT WAS going to be cancer, who would take care of the boys?!?!?! and when she hit upon those, i started to cry...and i am not a crier and it was just soooooo powerful....i left it at JESUS feet...i feel so happy and i feel sooooooooooo energized!! i keep smelling the beautiful ROSE anointment oils they used...it is soooo relaxing and makes me think of MOTHER MARY!

well, i am off to bed...today was the 1st day of the 9 days of the NOVENA FOR THE HOLY SPIRIT!! yesterday was THE LORDS ASSUMPTION INTO HEAVEN!! today STARTED the 9 days of prayer that everyone did after JESUS ASSENDED and 9 days from now, NEXT SUNDAY is PENTACOST SUNDAY...they day that the HOLY SPIRIT CAME TO THEM AND IT LOOKED LIKE TONGUES OF FLAMES and they started to speak in TONGUES!! WHAT A BEAUTIFUL DAY IT IS AND WILL BE!!!!

wednsday will be the day they do my BIOPSY ON MY ARM....praying for good news!

FIRST DOCTORS APPT.....DONE....

SO, today was my first appt with the ORTHOPEDICS department at SAMMC....it started at 1045 and ended at 1300! so, after getting the BEAUTIFUL BIG NEW AND IMPROVED BAMC hospital, i had to navigate the CRAZY hallways from one side of the hospital to the other!! boy, i almost needed a COMPASS!!! i know i could have STILL been there lost if i hadn't asked so many people WHERE AM I!?!?! anyway, finally got to see the PA there at orthopedics...VERY VERY nice man!!! was very comfortable with him. after he and his dr looked at the MRI, they felt that it was PROBABLY a PERIPHERAL NERVE SHEATH TUMOR instead of a histiosytoma....still not sure if it is cancer or not and will not be able to find out until i get an BIOPSY...soooo, i asked him was this something he sees a lot or something interesting and rare...he said VERY RARE and VERY INTERESTING...he has been consulting with many of his peers to see what they think....so,he said that we were going to go ahead and have surgery, remove tumor and then BIOPSY the tumor to see what it is.....so then they sent me off to RADIOLOGY to get an XRAY of my arm....done....as i am leaving the hospital (after negotiating the halls again) , i get to the outer door and check my phone and find out that he had called and left me a message...COME BACK....WE ARE THINKING OF SOMETHING ELSE WE MIGHT DO!!! LUCKILY, i saw that before i left, so turned around negotiated the halls AGAIN, made my way back and went back to talk to them....he said that after talking to ANOTHER doctor, she felt that instead of going in and having surgery right away, that maybe a better option would be to do a ULTRASOUND GUIDED BIOPSY of the tumor and IT MIGHT NOT BE A TUMORE BUT MIGHT BE A BUNDLE OF NERVES?! he said, that my chances of it being CANCER if it WAS a BUNDLE OF NERVES just went DOWN!!!!! so, then i scheduled a ULTRASOUND that is set up for TOMORROW at 1130 and then i have to make ANOTHER appt to see the PA again.....and then they will see if it is POSSIBLE to do the non invasive surgery or if it is NOT possible and then do the FULL SURGERY... sooooo, to recap: BEST CASE SENERIO: ULTRA SOUND SHOWS THAT IT WAS NOT A PERIPHERAL NERVE SHEATH TUMOR AND THEY CAN DO A ULTRASOUND GUIDED BIOPSY AND THERE IS ANOTHER WAY OF TREATING THIS MASS WITHOUT DOING OUTRIGHT SURGERY AND BIOPSY IS NOT CANCER WORST CASE SENERIO: ULTRA SOUND SHOWS THAT IT IS A PERIPHERAL NERVE SHEATH TUMOR, CAN'T DO A ULTRASOUND GUIDED BIOPSY AND NEED TO HAVE AN OPERATION TO REMOVE THE TUMOR AND BIOPSY IT tomorrow, i am going to do an ultrasound in the morning and then i should be going back to see the orthopedics dr and see what happens.... so there it is...we shall see what this day brings...it has been a LONG day....LONG LONG LONG day....i left at 0930, got home at 1315 just long enough for james and the boys to come and pick me up and we were off again (i never left my car) and ran over to grab some take out because we were going to watch the 1405 showing of the AVENGERS (which was AMAZING!!!!!), came home for EXACTLY one hour (long enough for matthew to have his teacher and some CLASS), AS SOON as she walked out, we WERE OUT of here and headed to 1ST COMMUNION PRACTICE over at the church and we made it home at 2055!!! boy, my DOGS hurt!!! heeheheheeee....just a bit crazy right now!!! hope tomorrow goes GREAT!!!! THANK YOU EVERYONE AND MANY BLESSINGS EVERYONE!

happy day today!!!

matthew is feeling better!!! after over a week of being soooo sick with congestion, wheezing and just feeling lousy, last night was the first night in almost a WEEK without having to need oxygen!!! woooohooo...he has another antibiotic on board after going to see his pulmonolgist on friday because he was STILL wheezing and having a hard time breathing after 9 doses of oral steroids, 4 days of an antibiotic and TONS AND TONS of nebulizer treatments every 3-4 hours...he has finally feels BETTER!!! still wheezing BUT able to keep his oxygen sats UP without the use of oxygen. it is such a BLESSING to us to see him back to almost normal. he is such a special little boy that even though he doesn't feel GREAT, he still smiles and laughs and just is MATTHEW.....SO NOw to CLEAR HIM UP so he doesn't have to have any more neb treatments and can just go back to 'normal' for him....he is REALLY starting to HATE the nebs and the suction and i don't blame him for it!!! i would hate it!! and now they are talking about getting him a IPV machine for the house...we were soooooo close to having to admit him into the hospital!!!! the dr was really worried about him/..after seeing the X-ray that we took on friday, he said there was INCREASED MARKINGS...hmmmm....poor baby! just happy that he has not needed to be admitted!!! WHEEEEWW!!! and ON a happy note, TODAY matthew started to SUCK ON A STRAW!!! whooohooo!! he lost his suck reflex at 7 months old and has never been able to do it since!! but recently he started to give KISSES, and today, i put them together with his ONE WAY VALVE STRAW and cup and told him to 'give the straw a kiss matt' and waalaa!! he DID IT@!!!! soooo happy and in AMAZEMENT of him! now just to watch him that he doesn't suck toooooooo hard that he aspirates!!! ;) AS FOR ME, well i am doing fine....thinking of my arm and wondering what will happen on tuesday at the drs office. they called me on friday morning to tell me that they could see me on tuesday....that was QUICK as far as the military system workings so i was VERY VERY happy to get that phone call the next morning after getting the news of my arm!~!! THANK YOU GOD! now to start this journey....i PRAY that there is a 'QUICK FIX' for this and it isn't the WORST CASE scenario...i can only PRAY that it is something that is treatable....BUT whatEVER the outcome, i am READY!! with GOD and my family and friends behind me, i will the strength to do ANYTHING.... after what matthew goes thru EVERYDAY, i know i can do it....and i will do it with a SMILE because i have FAITH in MY GOD that all will be well and it is HIS will!! if you can remember MAY 21st - MAY 26TH, 2004 when we got the news of matthew you will remember that thru iT ALLLLL, i had complete FAITH in GOD and i accepted it all and knew that whatever happened was GOD'S WILL and i believe now the same thing...GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME!!! ALL THE TIME GOD IS GOOD!!!! ready for TUESDAY to get here and find out some more!!!

FIBROUS HISTIOCYTOMA.....

BIG WORD huh?? Well, before this morning, it was a word that i had never heard....that and also PERIPHERAL NERVE SHEATH TUMOR.....well, after more than FIVE YEARS of pain and going to drs to find out WHAT THE HECK was wrong with my right forearm (and being told OVER AND OVER that it was TENNIS ELBOW), FINALLY, the PHYSICAL THERAPIST who was working with me, after palpating the area, decided that something was WRONG with my forearm and that if it WAS TENNIS ELBOW, it sure would not STILL be hurting YEARS LATER and progressively getting worst!!!! and he also palpated something on it that felt like a nodule....hmmmmmm, it took a PHYSICAL THERAPIST to FINALLY realize that SOMETHING was wrong with my arm!!! he told me i NEEDED to get an MRI ASAP because it was NOT NORMAL!!! SO, after FIRST having to make an appt with my PCM, then waiting for her to agree with him that i SHOULD get an MRI (after telling me YET AGAIN, that the symptoms SOUNDED like TENNIS ELBOW!!!), I got my MRI 3 weeks later and here i am, with an CONSULT to be seen by a ORTHOPEDIC ONCOLOGIST!!! yes, i am going to see a dr that specializes in CANCER....for my arm....that has been hurting for MORE THAN 5 YEARS....that i have gone to the dr OVER AND OVER again....and being told that it was TENNIS ELBOW!!! hmmm... so, there was no SHOCK involved in hear this diagnosis....i was soooooo calm!!! and IMMEDIATELY, the song YAHWEH, I KNOW YOU ARE NEAR.....i LOVE that song and i started to sing and think of that song...it brought me so much peace and it's one of my favorite songs and reminds me that he is EVER by MY SIDE and that i have nothing to fear....after everything that my beautiful son MATTHEW ISAIAH went thru, NOTHING that is going on in my life is ANYTHING compared to what he has gone thru and continues to go thru...he is such a STONG little boy and just seeing him everyday always and forever will assure me of my SAVIORS BEING BY MY SIDE....no matter WHAT is happening in my life, it is GOD'S WILL and it is HIS will through it all and he will see me thru it, one second at a time!!! :) soooo, i ask for prayers because that is one thing that i have such STRONG FAITH in that prayers are sooooo amazing and so strong and that when we ASK, HE WILL ANSWER AND HE WILL HEAR!!! i am ready for anything because 'THRU GOD, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE' MATTHEW 19:26....THAT has been our SAYING since OUR MATTHEW was born! :) and it continues to bring is strength thru our life!! sooooo, THANK YOU in advance for any prayers and good thoughts...i don't know what life will bring but i KNOW that THRU GOD, all will be ok and that my life is HIS and whatever He decides for me, is EXACTLY the way it needs to be!! :)

My parents....

well, i came to an AMAZING realization today....it is funny because when talking about my FAITH, i always SAY that as a family growing up, we were ALWAYS at church and we were ALWAYS so ACTIVE in our church community....but i don't think i have ever THANKED MY PARENTS for such an AMAZING UPBRINGING IN THE CHURCH!!!!!!!!!!! i have always said that i was brought up IN CHURCH but i have never come to the realization that it was BECAUSE OF MY PARENTS that that is why i am the way i AM....that is so WIERD! and UNFORTUNATLY, BOTH my parents are gone now...i will never get the chance to tell them FACE TO FACE THANK YOU for the BEAUTIFUL GIFT of bringing me FAITH TO MY LIFE....and even though, as a family, there was a LOT of trumoil in my growing up life, the most BEAUTIFUL thing that i have continued to RECIEVE from my PARENTS is MY FAITH....that was something that they have ALWAYS taught me and THANK YOU, MOM AND DAD for that!!! that is why i was able to meet my hubby, have my kids, go thru what i went thru with my beautiful MIRACLE SON MATTHEW and all the other things that have come in my life, it has ALL been BECAUSE OF MY FAITH given to me FROM MY PARENTS that i was able to LIVE MY LIFE AND BE AND FEEL BLESSED!!!

something that came to me as i was praying today....WHAT A BLESSING!!! THANK YOU GOD!

WOMENS ACTS RETREAT, BABY!!!

woooohooooo!!! what a BLESSING it was to be able to go to this retreat (March 3-6)....it was just such an amazing experience....FINALLY being a part of my church community. that is something that i have CRAVED since we started going there back 14 years ago! i was always so use to be a PART of my church community growing up...i was in the chior, the youth group, part of the festival commity, helping out in festival events and such, even at TEXAS TECH i was involved in the retreat community & the chior and the student center...to go from full on a PART of commmunity to NOTHING was REALLY a shock...but i never changed that...i was a PCP (parking church parking lot) but NOW i am a PART of my community and part of ACTS!!! i am hoping that i will also be a part of the ROSARY GUILD! i think that is just such an AMAZING ministry!! i am EXCITED!!!!!! and now i have SISTERS IN CHRIST and BROTHERS IN CHRIST and i am A PART OF MY COMMUNITY!!!!!!!!!!!! woooohoooooo!!! :) PRAISE BE THE LORD for that BLESSING!!!

well, if you couldn't tell, the retreat was just amazing!! i LOVED every minute of it. it was REALLY REALLY HARD on thursday and some of friday because i was missing my boys soooooooo much! it was really the FIRST time i have ever had ABSOLUTELY NO CONTACT with them for 3 nights and FOUR DAYS!!!!!!!! that is what ALMOST kept me home because to leave my babies and not be here to watch over them ESPECIALLY my matthew that it was hard...remember i am a SAHM and a HOMESCHOOLING mom so they don't even go to school...the longest i don't see them is MAYBE a couple of hours!!! i kept crying whenever i thought about it (and you KNOW i am not a crier!!)....but i made it and after the first night, GOD saw me thru it and took away my anxiety and worry and just blessed me with PEACE!!!!!

soooo, now to CONTINUE what i have LEARNED this weekend so that i may bless my family. I LOVE YOU GOD AND I THANK YOU WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL FOR BEING BY MY SIDE EVERYDAY OF MY LIFE!!!! YOU ARE THE LIGHT OF WORLD!!

HAPPY 14th ANNIVERSARY!!!

14 YEARS ago, I married the most wonderful man in my life that GOD had BLESSED me with!! And I am so HAPPY to say that being married to him HAS been the best 14 years of my life. I know some of you have heard about how I met him but for those that don’t know, well, you can call it a TRUE love story BLESSED by GOD! 
See, over 16 years ago I met the love of my life! What is AMAZING is that my husband is my COUSIN'S BEST FRIEND and has been since middle school!! we have probably met each other SOMETIME during all those years they were friends...he was always WITH my cousin and we use to have tons of parties and get togethers and such growing up...wow...it took a PARTY in NOV 1994 that was given for him and all my cousins for their birthdays for us to meet and fall in love at FIRST SIGHT! yes, that was us, LOVE...it was so pure and so SPECIAL...GOD brought us together in such a special way..what’s funny is that my cousin invited me to this party that she and her family were having for a couple of my cousin AND JAMES because all their birthdays were in NOV. at first I didn’t want to go because I WAS very shy and I couldn’t get any of my friends to go with me, but I had promised her I would go (what’s funny is that out of the BLUE she called me to invite me to the party (we usually only saw each other on holidays or special occations so it was different))anyway, so I went and WOW, when she said PARTY she meant PARTY! I was expecting a small gathering, but there were cars lined up BLOCKS away and as I got nearer to the house, I see strobe lights and hear MUSIC and tons of people! Wowowowow…not very comfortable for me and getting ready to turn around and HEAD HOME!!! But I said a prayer, “Lord, if I can’t find a parking space right near her house, I will have turn around, because I am scared and by myself”..thinking I had the PERFECT out because I just figured with this many cars and people there would DEFINETLY not be a spot anywhere near the house, and as I come up, RIGHT IN FRONT of her house, there is a parking space OPEN!! Wow, if that was not GOD clearly wanting me to be there, I don’t know what else he could have done!! So, I said, “ok Lord, I am staying, please be near me and help me to get thru this night!” so I walk up and I recognize NO ONE in all the crowd and that’s when I hear my name being called and look up and see my cousin and this guy coming up to me..she hugs me and this guy with her gives me a one arm hug and says ‘ hey, I’m JAMES your cousin too” and I said, ‘uh, your not MY cousin” and tricia, my cousin says, “this is James, Joey’s best friend”..I said, “Hi”…I thought he was soooo cute but figured that he MUST have a girlfriend or someone special and was off limits so I turned around and we went inside to say hola to my family…well, from then, he followed me EVERYWHERE!! It was funny but like he will tell you, I just ‘blew him off’..I was really just so unsure of myself and self conscious that I just could NOT believe that he had any interest in ME! Anyway, the night went on and he asked me to dance and that was it…LOVE!  (he actually went home that night and told his MOM that he had met the woman he was going to MARRY!) ...GOD showed me that not all men are horrible and abusive...that there are good men out there! HE showed me on that day as CLEAR as a bell what type of man my husband was....how? well, as we went to the store that night i met him, i ACCIDDENTLY spilled about 20oz red punch on my husband BRAND NEW TRUCK (it was 2 DAYS old!)!! OMG, i was so SCARED and EMBARRASED because i was SURE that he would yell at me, hit me or SOMETHING, which i know that he had every right to (at the time) but instead, my wonderful husband sat there and consoled me and told me "HEY, IT'S OK! IT IS JUST A TRUCK! IT WILL CLEAN UP!!!!" can you IMAGINE?! i was in SHOCK, but i was ready to go home because i was so upset and crying and when i told him i was going home, he told me "DON'T GO...I JUST MET YOU!! PLEASE STAY..." awwwwww....that was when GOD showed me what a special man that was! he NEVER got upset or mad at me that i spilled that drink in his truck...not ONCE! that is what and who my man is!! since that day, we have been inseperable....we have always enjoyed being together and just being US...where he goes, I go! When other couples went out without each other, we NEVER have!! We feel STRONGLY that as a couple, we will only go out together…we are all about our family FIRST and we LOVE to spend our time together and go camping and just hanging out…we both feel SOOO BLESSED that GOD had brought us together and HE has BLESSED us THREE TIMES with our beautiful kiddos!! everything that we have, that we ARE and just EVERYTHING we know are THRU GOD!! And THANK YOU GOD for 14 years of marriage BLISS!!! What a BLESSING it has been!!!
.....

THIS PICTURE WAS TAKEN THE DAY WE MET!!! just look at us...we are SOUL MATES....


ON OUR WEDDING DAY....


AT OUR RECEPTION...


THIS montage was done LAST YEAR for our 10 year anniversart...please feel free and check it out if you would like to see our years together in pictures ..

Make an on-line slide show at www.OneTrueMedia.com

GONZALEZ FAMILY UPDATE...prayers needed please!

Hola Family and friends!



We hope that everyone has had a WONDERFUL 8 months of the year and are ready for the last couple of months left of 2010!!! As for us, well, it has been DEFINETLY an UP and DOWN kind of year. So much has happened in the last 8 months that sometimes I am just in awe of what has gone on!! J I haven’t give anyone on update in a VERY long time so I thought I would go ahead and get one out…



Well, as a family all is wonderful. We are enjoying life and being together as a family. Nothing makes us happier than when we spend time with each other. Having the blessing of being able to be together and watch our children grow, is just such a GRAND experience and we THANK GOD everyday for such blessings!! We have done a couple of camping times. This summer, we took a 2 weeks vacation and did some RVing and spent some time at the coast. Just tons of FAMILY time. Since we have a pool, boy, we have DEFINETLY had some great use out of it. The boys LOVE going swimming!!



Well, our little alex is now 8 YEARS OLD!!! Wow, it is just AMAZING to me to have an 8 years old in our house. And he is GROWING by leaps and bounds. He is out of his 5 point harnest and into a booster chair now. That is a big thing for him. He is such a cutie. He is now in 3rd grade and doing FABULOUSLY in our homeschool work. He has a Monday playdate and a Tuesday PE class and he LOVES it!!! J just watching him play with other kids, is great. We usually have a very busy schedule and he still manages to IMPRESS me in how smart he is. Just watching him think his way thru a problem or read something and then remember what he read and know what it talked about is just so amazing to me. He loves his baby brothers and just has so much fun playing with them. He is such a GREAT big brother!! J



Then there is Matthew. Well, matthew is now 6 years old. Again, AMAZING! He has been thru some rough roads with him since the beginning of this year. Lets see, he started the year off with RSV, went on to have KAWASAKI SYNDROME and was hospitalized for 4 days, and now, well, the scariest of all things is happening to matthew, and we are asking for MANY MANY MANY PRAYERS for this little boy. For a while now, he has been REALLY restless during the night and was ALL over the place, so I called his neurologist to let him know that SOMETHING was going on….well, On June 29th, he had massive seizure that we had to be taken to the hospital via EMS….he then had a 24 hour video EEG done and come to find out that he was having seizures in the front and back ALL THE TIME. As he lay sleeping at 0700, the dr walked in and was watching his monitor and said that he was having seizures the whole time…that was just so HEARTBREAKING for me to hear! I knew SOMETHING was going on but was so hoping it was not THAT!!! So, we were placed on a new seizure med called VIMPAT on top of his other 2 seizure meds…and these sezirues are VERY different…not like anything we had ever seen. The other scary thing is that he stops breathing with these seizures and we have had to BAG him, which we personally have never had to do. Usually the EMS crew does it. Well, not anymore…and what a horrible feeling it is to have to BAG your son with oxygen, have him BLUE, totally unresponsive & his Oxygen sats down in the 40’s…well, since the 29th of June, he has had a 2 more seizures in July and 5 in August and here we are on September 1st and I PRAY that they finally STOP!! If you can imagine, it went from 2 seizure in 2 YEARS to 8 seizures in less than 2 MONTHS….A new seizure med was started on Aug 30th and we are back on CLONOPIN so we are now officially up to 4 seizure med….not HAPPY! And it makes HIM not happy. You can tell it is definetly affecting him because he is REALLY sleepy and very irratible! My poor little boy. we are now thinking of getting some NIGHT NURSING…yep, the one we said we would NOT get but because these seizures are not your regular ones and they are happening at ALL hours of his sleep, I am not getting much sleep at all. I actually have a CRICK in my neck from turning to look at the monitor every couple of minutes…I need someone to watch him sleep!!! L So, what we are going to start in this coming month is, he is going to be placed on the KETOGENIC DIET which has been known to help with stopping seizures. So, they will take him off of his current G-TUBE formula (peptimum, jr) to a KETO-CAL formula. I read up on it and basically, it is a LOW-CARB diet…I THINK we will be admitted into the hospital for a couple of days…NC Baptist I think…and if he does well on this, then HOPEFULLY the seizures will have stopped, maybe some meds taken off and all will be well..PLEASE JESUS, let it all go WELL!!!! But other than that, he is doing AMAZING!!! He is in 1st grade now and he is getting SOOO BIG! He is so smart too. I love when he talks to us or he tries really hard to tell us something. And the BEST thing that came out of his seizures is that he is EATING ORALLY LIKE A CHAMP! Yep, my little boy is LOVING eating. He wakes up and signs EAT and he eats breakfast, lunch and dinner. And I am talking he EATS not just nibbles. Could be why he has gained so much weight!! He is now 42 lbs!!! he is getting HEAVY! But he is such a cutie and he is getting so strong. Unfortunately, with these recent seizures, he has had some weakness now that is causing him to be MORE LOW TONED….i just pray that he gets his strength back SOON!!! He loves his brothers and loves to challenge them! He is SOMETHING else when he gets MAD at one of them. He will sit there and YELL at them if they are having issues. So cute!!! That is our little boy!!



And then there is JOSHUA who is now 3 years old. Wow, this little boy is SOMETHING else. I love him SOOO MUCH but he is the 3rd child…he is the one that gets into EVERYTHING…and he is currently into the terrible 2 at 3! He favorite word is NO or UH-HU…and he is a little con artist cause he will say in a whiny voice’no alex, stop’ and I will catch him saying that and alex is across the room or something and alex is like, I am not even touching you!!! So, he tries to get brother in trouble all the time. He is also very LOUD…he loves to sing but LOUDLY, he loves to play but play LOUDLY…my ears are usually ringing by the end of the day. But he LOVES to play with alex and he love to tease matthew. Such a CUTIE!!!



Well, james is doing very good. He is at a new unit here in san Antonio so that means that we are STAYING in san Antonio!! J either way I would have been happy but now especially with Matthews seizures, I am so glad we are staying here..we are hoping that he gets his promotion soon so then we can start looking for a new home…he finished PHASE 2 of his BNOC school….we REALLY need a one story house….matthew is getting soooooo heavy and with his recent seizures, he is almost too weak to go up the stairs on his own and we have to carry him and he is HEAVY!!! Anyway, james is doing well and he is gearing up for HUNTING SEASON. Yep, let the shooting begin! One of his favorite sports! He started TODAY at his new job and it is at CAMP BULLIS now so a bit closer than where he was at before. I feel sad for him because his whole unit before is now all scattered around TEXAS …they were sooo close. I know they will stay friends but no longer work together….



As for me, well, so-so…I am ALIVE and I am BLESSED so I really shouldn’t complain. But since my surgery back in feb 2010, my body has not been the same…I have been back and forth to the doctors and surgeons trying to find out WHY I am continue to have gastro issues…I have had colonoscopies, blood work, scopes, etc and they still don’t’ know what is going on. I wonder if they injured something while they did the surgery…anyway, I just wanted it FIX cause it is LIFE ALTERING what I am going thru…my fibro is kicking my butt too, but again, with all the stress of the surgery and now with matthew seizures, my little body is going nuts! J



But THANK YOU GOD, our little family is doing well. We have started up on our school year again and we are enjoying doing classes. Waiting for the HOLIDAYS to come. It is just around the corner now!!!! We take one day at a time and we take our evenings very seriously. We have tried to keep matthew to a strict in bed time of 8:30 to make sure he gets plenty of sleep. So needless to say, we are ALL on a schedule now. We tend to notice if we have had a LONG day, he will end up with a seizure!!



So, we hope this letter finds everyone doing AMAZING and well. We ask PLEASE if you can please pray for our little boy, MATTHEW that his seizures resolve and he has them NO MORE. I am so sad for him because now with all these meds, he is not the same little boy…he is really tired all the time and GRUMPY!! GOD WILLING these seizure meds GO AWAY!!!



Thanks again, everyone!! until next time, TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS!!!



James, Maria, Alex, Matthew, & Joshua

need to get back to blogging....

yep, it has been a LONG TIME since i really have been up to date on my blogging...life seems to get in the way of it....but really, there is really no reason...FACEBOOK is my new favorite place to post stuff but why i do it there and not here, well, i don't know! i SHOULD do it more often here because this is forever and facbook just keeps rolling by....

sooo, life has been great....my boys are all doing wonderful, THANK YOU GOD...we are getting ready to start our school...maybe next week?! we have all our curriculum, THANK YOU GOD and alex is ready to get going...i am just ready to get started back on our schedule...I LOVE HOMESCHOOLING and yestereday, i joined the NORTH WEST HOMESCHOOL EDUCATORS and i am really excited! field trips, tons of fellowship for me AND the boys...so i am excited...just need my history and science book and that should be this week! :)

wow, our pool is GREEN!! YUCKY! yep, after our birthday party on the 1st, with all the kiddos jumping in after playing hard and sweating all day, it just killed the pool!!! :( and since james is gone for 2 weeks, who gets to clean it up?! ME!! OH WELL...i just hope i can do it...i am PRAYING that today's treatment is IT...if not, it is dumping the water and doing it again...sign...pools are sooo much work but so much fun..

Dad's Rosary...

today, we had my dad's rosary...it was very nice and to hear nice things from those of his co-workers at the church...it seemed that he still worked at his church lighting the candles at the TABERNACLE...that is sooo AWESOME to hear...

My dad passed away today...

well, we got the call at 9am....we were in church and when i got out and looked at my phone i had a message fromt he hospice place...when i called over there, they said my dad had passed away unexpectedly at 8:55am...i say unexpectendly because hospice can usually tell the family and give them a couple of HOURS before they think the pt will pass away...there are certain signs...well, my dad had a GREAT Blood pressure at 7:30 in the morning....the dr was making his rounds and before he could make it there, a nurses aid walked in to his room to check on my dad and he had just suddenly passed away....i am sad that there was no one there to be with him BUT i was also happy that the ONE thing that i had wanted (for him to see me again, to meet his grandkids, to hear himself called GRANDPA and to hear me tell him that i loved him and he told me he loved me) happened...i am AT PEACE as i know that he was too...he saw all his brothers (except one and one sister that was too ill to travel) and he saw NUMEROUS neices/nephews, cousins that came to see him...that was important to ME and i know it was to him too...he had lived a very solitary life after he and my mom divorced...he had not only distanced himself from ME but from ALL his familyl....

sooo, REST IN PEACE, DAD....no matter what, I LOVE YOU and will MISS you as always...i am glad we got to RECONNECT before you passed away and i will have no regrets....GOD BLESS....