well....pretty much he WILL be going....

yep, i just spoke to james and he just informed me that his big boss basically said, if the other person, for some reason, does NOT get chosen to go on this feb orders (it was between him and another person) then JAMES WILL BE GOING OVERSEAS....and if the other person DOES go, then james WILL BE GOING IN THE MARCH/APRIL/MAY DEPLOYMENT....so, one way or another, he WILL be going overseas sometime in the NEAR FUTURE....wow, what do i feel? numbness and just....emptyness?! i am really scared for him to go....but we always KNEW that because the war in ON GOING, he was going to be going SOMETIME in the future!! i always remember that i am not the FIRST or ONLY wife left behind that was pg, had 2 kiddos (even if one was special needs) that their hubby had to deploy to iraq....

sooooo, i PRAY....


i didn't know i needed to talk to someone and a VERY GOOD FRIEND OF MINE, came by unexpectedly to the house and we talked and we prayed.......she is a friend that has a special needs kiddo that is also a miracle and she reminded me how powerful prayer is and if we ASK GOD for something, it can happen...so, i will PRAY like i prayed for my son who is a miracle.....and just pray that my husband does not have to go...but i also understand and ACCEPT if it is meant for him to go....i WILL be strong and i AM strong for my husband and my kiddos and for ME!!!

we will find out at the end of this weekend if he will go or not....