GOODBYE 2012....HAPPY 2013!!!

WOW...2013 CAME AND WENT IN A FLASH!!!! hard to believe that a whole year went by soooo quickly!! my cousin and i last night were talking about ONE WORD that would describe 2012 and then one word we WANT to describe 2013...i came up with for 2012...DAZED....for 2013...it's a double edge word=BLESSED/FAITH...i'll explain each one...
FOR 2012...the year of MANY ups and downs....for me DAZED is the word of the year because sooooo much happened to me personally in that year...and i don't know if it was because of my pain medication or just everything personally that was happening to me that i was constantly in a DAZE...things that i normally did such as keep up with matthew's appts, meds, numerous phone calls that i NEED to make and just generally all the stuff that comes with having a special needs little guy i was putting off, FORGETTING (a BIG no-no) and just NOT DOING THEM...it was crazy when BEFORE i had been soooo organized, had my book with aaaallllll my notes and such and this year....uh...not so much!! i can honestly say, i have NO RECORD of names i have spoken to when calling for important things or any NOTES other than those on little bits of papers all over the house that i know i can't put together!!! :( so not MEEEE!!! AND THEN with the homeschooling front...i have taken such a BACK SEAT to it and pretty much let ALEX do what he needs to do and nothing else...we have been soooooo busy with appts for matthew, appts for ME, and playdates/extra classes for ALEX that we are constantly on the GO GO GOOOO!!! it's crazy!! but this year has been full of BLESSINGS as i CONSTATLY say about my life...even with all the crazy and dazed feeling, i STILL KNOW and FEEL like i am BLESSED!!! GOD IS SOOOO GOOD and has ALWAYS been in me, with me... He is at the START of me and everyday is such a BLESSING no matter what the day brings...i feel like no matter what, because i have GOD in my life, it will be a BLESSED DAY!!!! :)

this year, my children, THANK YOU GOD, have grown sooooooo much!!! my ALEX turned 10 this year (double digits, baby!) and he is now in 5th grade! he is a couple of inches shorter than me and keeps getting BIGGER!! he is sooooooo smart!! REALLY not an exaggeration or mommy prejudice! :) he has such an INCREDIBLE mind and such an AMAZING memory! he can recall things that i don't even remember and he has to remind us about it. and wowowowowow, on his schooling...watching him figure out all his subjects and KNOW how to do it and also, impressing the HECK out of us when a cousin 2 years older than him, bringing over some HOMEWORK for school (math) and the cousin was having a problem and didn't understand the math and alex coming over, casually looking it over in 2 secs, KNOWING THE ANSWER and answering CORRECTLY!!! crazy! and him HELPING that cousin with the rest of his work! and then same with other subjects he had brought over!! MY BIG BOY!!!! and he started CYO BASEBALL this year with our church and watching him GROW from NEVER having played ANY sport before to joining a team that was ESTABLISHED, intergrating himself and really coming from never played baseball (batted/catching balls/RUNNING/throwing balls, etc) to after the season, LOVING it and really knowing how to PLAY the game and do everything he NEEDED to do without being scared!!! my, how he has GROWN!!! and in his FAITH, he is AMAZING!! he LOVES GOD and he probably knows MORE about the bible and our FAITH than james and i combined!! so proud of our little boy!!

and then there is MATTHEW....he turned 8 this year...another miracle in our life!! wowow...time has FLOWN with this little boy too..watching him get BIGGER, is just so amazing and we MARVEL at everything he has DONE and is LEARNING!!! this year, he made his FIRST COMMUNION!!! wooohooo! we are sooo proud of him and what an ACCOMPLISHMENT that is! and he is now in 3rd grade and is doing WELL with his amazing teacher. unfortunately, this year has brought FUSTRATION to him which in turns causes him to lash out sometimes because we DON'T UNDERSTAND!!! :( he does not do it often but he gets sooo frustrated! poor guy! can't wait and i PRAY he will either learn to talk or sign or use his TALKER! :) he has taken off on EATING like a champ orally and has gained weight. he KNOWS HOW TO SPELL HIS NAME PHONICALLY and if you give him the letters, he can spell it that way too! he is also learning to READ and knows all his ABC, NUMBERS, PHONICS, SHAPES, OBJECTS, ETC and we are just crazy proud of all he has done!! on the flip side, HEALTH WISE, it has been an UP AND DOWN YEAR...seizure wise, it was 27.5 MONTHS without seizures until dec 9th when he had one at 0430 and lasted for at least 20 mins...so, our count down is back down to 1....his LUNGS have been a BIG PROBLEM this year with CONSTANT illness, wheezing, junky, on crazy amounts of STEROIDS, TREATMENTS, antibiotics, doctors appts, etc ALLLLL YEAR LONG!! :( NOT a good year for his health...he is doing well with his CPAP, and through all the illness, he is STILL OUR HAPPY BOY!!! so proud of him!

and our SURPRISE BLESSING JOSHUA...he turned 5 this year and it has been a BLESSED year for him!! he is such a HAPPY boy and full of life and mischief! we were sooooo BLESSED that he was our little surprise. he is our BABY and just watching him grow up is bittersweet because we know there will be no more after him!! :( even though i wanted another little one but GOD has other plans and that is ok. but he is our little sports guy. he LOVES to be playing ball...this year, he started CYO BASKETBALL and he was soooo good!! he is still so good and one of the better players! :) and then he also played CYO BASEBALL T-BALL!! awwww....watching him out there is such a JOY!! :) AND this year he is in KINDERGARDEN!! and he is learning all his phonics and such and is doing REALLY good in his schooling....soooo proud of this little guy!!!

James is doing GREAT!!! he has a GREAT position at work and his working sooooo hard and doing SOOOO GOOD!! we are so proud of all the hard work he does for our family! he is now also a COACH for CYO sports so he is active with the boys and their practices and games...he is in his ELEMENT with all of them and enjoys being out there with the boys and the KIDS! it's been a crazy year for all the traveling and away time the military has had him doing this year....and next year promises more of the same but it is ALLLLLL for PROMOTION as he makes his way to E-8!!! so we will take that!! he soooo deserves all of that and MORE because he is one of the BEST EMPLOYEES the military has and that is not just a PROUD WIFE talking either!! :) he has gotten a lot of recognition from his superiors and we are really just soooo proud of him!!! and this year HE EARNED HIS 20 YEARS OF MILITARY SERVICE FOR OUR GREAT COUNTRY!!! wowowowowowow....what an ACCOMPLISHMENT!! again, so proud of him!! unfortunately, it is not ACTIVE years so we still have a little over 8 years left to reach 20 YEARS ACTIVE DUTY FULL RETIREMENT years!! and that is what he is working for....we PRAY that the US ARMY continue to keep him employed!! we are SOOOOOO BLESSED to be ACTIVE DUTY MILITARY!!! THANK YOU GOD!!!

AS FOR MEEEEEE....hmmmmmmm...it has been as always a BLESSED YEAR!!! this year, my pain in my arm had unfortunately gotten WORST...sooo bad that i couldn't even shake hands, play wii or any other activities that required me to use my right arm WITHOUT EXTREME PAIN!!! i had complained to my DOCTOR (dx TENNIS ELBOW (for the 5+ year), i had complained to my rheumitologist also and gotten a STEROID SHOT and told it was TENNIS ELBOY (for the 2+ year) and put BACK into PHYSICAL THERAPY (JAN 2012)...and during my evaluation the physical therapist found a BALL on my forearm and told me that that didn't feel right and i needed to get an MRI....and what a LIFE SAVER THAT WAS!!! :) because, after FINALLY getting an MRI (IN APRIL), it was found that i had a TUMOR and was IMMEDIATELY s (within 4 days) was being seen at the ORTHOPEDIC ONCOLOGY DEPARTMENT AT SAMMC!!! :( yep, they didn't know what type of tumor but they felt that it COULD BE CANCER....and ultimately IT WAS SYNOVIAL SARCOMA===CANCER....i really never thought i would ever have that DX but there it was....and the doctor was concerned enough that he needed it out NOW....so on JULY 31ST, 2012, it was roomed and thru the GRACE OF GOD, because of HIS BLESSINGS, they were able to get the WHOLE THING OUT due to the MIRACLE that it was ENCAPSULATED so i didn't have to have CHEMOTHERAPY/RADIATION!!! PRAISE GOD! but now, i have to have PET SCANS every 3 months and see the doctor ever 3 months for 2 years and then move on 2 twice a year for 3 years then yearly for the rest of my life!! :( and now i know WHY we could not get PREGNANT again even when it was timed right on etc....GOD HAD OTHER PLANS!! :) so, again, BLESSING BLESSING BLESSINGS!!! other than that, just a regular crazy, DAZED YEAR!!!

AND FOR THIS YEAR, 2013 my word(s) of the year would be FAITH/BLESSED....WHY 2? BECAUSE I HAVE FAITH, I AM BLESSED.....I AM BLESSED TO HAVE FAITH!! GOD will be utmost in my life and MY FAITH will be front and center. i pray i will learn more about GOD, learn more ABOUT MY FAITH and just get closer to that which has LOVED ME UNCONDITIONALLY, that has BLESSED ME AND MY FAMILY, that who has GIVEN ME SO MANY REASONS TO BE HAPPY!!!!! and that would be GOD! i am going to devote this year and ALWAYS to learning more about GOD and about my faith....I LOVE LOVE LOVE HIM!!!

sooooo, that is it....2012 is gone and 2013 is here...i will plan to make this year a BLESSED year and a YEAR OF FAITH....this year will GOD WILLING bring a new blessing in my brothers life.....a BABY!!!! and we will GOD WILLING be going to see her and my family and i will be traveling to HAWAII IN MAY!!! WOOOHOOOO!!! yes, all 5 of us!! wowowowowow....we will keep trucking along and just enjoying life, loving my family!!!

GOD'S BLESSINGS TO EVERYONE AND FOR THE YEAR TO COME!!!! love ya'll!!!