Wishes DO come true...our FAMILY in FLORIDA!! :)

Saturday, December 25, 2010


Merry Christmas from our Family! December 2010

Hola Family and Friends,

We are praying that everyone is doing wonderful and have been enjoying the Christmas Season. We are all doing well. The boys just keep getting bigger and cuter if that is possible! J We just wanted to give everyone a family update to let ya’ll know what has been going on in our little piece of heaven on earth!

Alex is now 8 years old and he is doing wonderful. He is in 3rd grade and is enjoying his Homeschool work. He is so smart and has been excelling in all his studies. He does amazing creations with his legos and just last month, dad got his drums out for him and all I can say is WOW! He is so good at the drums! I guess he gets that from his dad! ;) he loves to read anything that has to do with legos! And BOY does he know his FAITH and his BIBLE stories! So proud of him!!! He is always reminding me and teaching me something about that….

Matthew is now 6 years old and he is getting so big! He is in 1st grade and is so smart. Health wise it has been an up and down year. Earlier in the year, he was diagnosed with Kawasaki syndrome and spent some time in the hospital. Then in June, he started having seizures again…he ended up having 8 seizures in less than 2 months and went several times to the hospital via EMS. They were very bad and scary, but THANK YOU GOD, it has been over 3 months since he has had them. There has been a change in his medications that have helped. We now also have NIGHT NURING again. This was something we said we would NEVER get again but it has been a GOD SENT! His seizure were happening at ALL hours so for a while there, I had not been SLEEPING cause we just never knew WHEN they would happen. The nurse has really helped me get some sleep. I was running on about 3 hours of fit ful sleep trying to watch him. My neck actually hurt like CRAZY from glancing over at the monitor every couple of minutes!! Unfortunately, one of the seizures that he had in August was REALLY bad that I thought he might had had a stroke cause his left side was not working after he was done and as a result, he has been hyperextending his left arm and his left side is weaker all the way down….he will now need to wear a brace being especially made for his arm because everytime he crawls, he kept falling cause his arm would buckle!! L But, one of The great side of the seizure is he is now eating ORALLY and has had his G-tube feed reduced because he is doing so well and has gained so much weight because of it! J what a BLESSING to have to buy him his OWN meal now cause he will eat it all! Just love it! Respiratory wise, he is doing well and as long as he is on his antibiotic, he remains healthy. He LOVES watching movies and his current favorite shows is KIPPER and THE UPSIDE DOWN SHOW….yep, he is ALWAYS trying to ‘turn me off’ on his remote or pause me! If you haven’t seen this show, it is pretty cute and funny. He LAUGHS so hard when he watches it. He usually falls asleep to this show. Something new he has been doing is that his is pulling up on EVERYTHING!! For those with kiddos, remember that age when they were JUST learning to walk and they would pull up on EVERYTHING, well, that is what is happening but this is a 45 lb little boy doing it that can SEE over the counter and is forever pulling up onto the counter and pulling things Off of the counters, sticking his hands in dirty dish water, etc etc….yep, it has been fun trying to keep up with him…but he is cute!! Lots more bruises now than every before.

Joshua is now 3 years old and he is such a CUTIE! He is really smart and loves sports. He is AMAZING playing basketball and making shots! We are in AWE of him cause he will not MISS! And just recently, Santa brought him an early gift and it was a full size basketball and we found out he could dribble and walk at the same time! Yep, very talented! J he loves to sing and copy EVERYTHING that his big brother is doing. And I am happy to say he is STILL a mama’s boy!! awww..he cuddles with me all the time. Now if only I could get him potty trained…..

James is doing well. He is at a new job site over in Camp Bullis and is trying to get it all straight. God willing, he will be promoted soon to an E7!! We are anxiously waiting for that day. He so deserves it! He did some hunting this year but unfortunately, did not shoot anything. In November, he attended an ACTS retreat at our church & he received God back into his life. He was always there but now James feels Him, sees Him and is just SOAKED in His presence! It’s been a BLESSING! He is just such an AMAZING daddy and husband and we have been soooo blessed that God put him in our lives.

As for myself, I am doing well. I had some surgery for my reflux earlier in the year that REALLY took a LONG time for me to recover. I ended up with a partial collapsed lung & some plural effusion and collitis. It is still a battle…my fibromyalgia has been really rough. I am actually in physical therapy 2 times a week for it. Lots of pain and just yuck. GOD WILLING this too will pass and it will settle back down. The therapist is forever saying that I need to make sure and TELL him if it hurts because he knows that I have been putting up with the pain for SOOO long but he doesn’t want me to take it anymore. He wants to make sure that he is doing something to help me. And it has….but I know it is going to be slow progress….still trying to decide if I am going to do the steroid shot on my arm or not….well, this year, was my 20 year reunion from HIGH SCHOOL!! Wowow, who KNEW! It seems like just yesterday I was in high school! Can’t believe it has been over 20 years!!!! And wow, how time has changed everything!! Just crazy! Well, on a sad note, my father passed away this year. So that means that both my parents are gone now. My only brother, Daniel, Is currently serving in alfganistan and will be there for a year. Please say a prayer for him and all our soldiers so that they may come home soon and safelty!

i have been BLESSED always in my life. Nothing in my life is so bad, thru GOD! He brings such blessings and joys in my life that I try not to ever complain!!! GOD IS GOOD ALL THE TIME! ALL THE TIME, GOD IS GOOD!

So there you have it! our family update. We Pray that this finds you and your families healthy and happy and joyfully awaiting the coming New Year! Always remember that “..thru GOD, all things are possible” matt 19:26.

We would love to hear from ya’ll to let us know how ya’ll are doing! Please drop us a line sometime!

Happy New Years!!

Love, James, Maria, Alex, Matthew & Joshua or

Thursday, September 02, 2010

GONZALEZ FAMILY UPDATE...prayers needed please!

Hola Family and friends!

We hope that everyone has had a WONDERFUL 8 months of the year and are ready for the last couple of months left of 2010!!! As for us, well, it has been DEFINETLY an UP and DOWN kind of year. So much has happened in the last 8 months that sometimes I am just in awe of what has gone on!! J I haven’t give anyone on update in a VERY long time so I thought I would go ahead and get one out…

Well, as a family all is wonderful. We are enjoying life and being together as a family. Nothing makes us happier than when we spend time with each other. Having the blessing of being able to be together and watch our children grow, is just such a GRAND experience and we THANK GOD everyday for such blessings!! We have done a couple of camping times. This summer, we took a 2 weeks vacation and did some RVing and spent some time at the coast. Just tons of FAMILY time. Since we have a pool, boy, we have DEFINETLY had some great use out of it. The boys LOVE going swimming!!

Well, our little alex is now 8 YEARS OLD!!! Wow, it is just AMAZING to me to have an 8 years old in our house. And he is GROWING by leaps and bounds. He is out of his 5 point harnest and into a booster chair now. That is a big thing for him. He is such a cutie. He is now in 3rd grade and doing FABULOUSLY in our homeschool work. He has a Monday playdate and a Tuesday PE class and he LOVES it!!! J just watching him play with other kids, is great. We usually have a very busy schedule and he still manages to IMPRESS me in how smart he is. Just watching him think his way thru a problem or read something and then remember what he read and know what it talked about is just so amazing to me. He loves his baby brothers and just has so much fun playing with them. He is such a GREAT big brother!! J

Then there is Matthew. Well, matthew is now 6 years old. Again, AMAZING! He has been thru some rough roads with him since the beginning of this year. Lets see, he started the year off with RSV, went on to have KAWASAKI SYNDROME and was hospitalized for 4 days, and now, well, the scariest of all things is happening to matthew, and we are asking for MANY MANY MANY PRAYERS for this little boy. For a while now, he has been REALLY restless during the night and was ALL over the place, so I called his neurologist to let him know that SOMETHING was going on….well, On June 29th, he had massive seizure that we had to be taken to the hospital via EMS….he then had a 24 hour video EEG done and come to find out that he was having seizures in the front and back ALL THE TIME. As he lay sleeping at 0700, the dr walked in and was watching his monitor and said that he was having seizures the whole time…that was just so HEARTBREAKING for me to hear! I knew SOMETHING was going on but was so hoping it was not THAT!!! So, we were placed on a new seizure med called VIMPAT on top of his other 2 seizure meds…and these sezirues are VERY different…not like anything we had ever seen. The other scary thing is that he stops breathing with these seizures and we have had to BAG him, which we personally have never had to do. Usually the EMS crew does it. Well, not anymore…and what a horrible feeling it is to have to BAG your son with oxygen, have him BLUE, totally unresponsive & his Oxygen sats down in the 40’s…well, since the 29th of June, he has had a 2 more seizures in July and 5 in August and here we are on September 1st and I PRAY that they finally STOP!! If you can imagine, it went from 2 seizure in 2 YEARS to 8 seizures in less than 2 MONTHS….A new seizure med was started on Aug 30th and we are back on CLONOPIN so we are now officially up to 4 seizure med….not HAPPY! And it makes HIM not happy. You can tell it is definetly affecting him because he is REALLY sleepy and very irratible! My poor little boy. we are now thinking of getting some NIGHT NURSING…yep, the one we said we would NOT get but because these seizures are not your regular ones and they are happening at ALL hours of his sleep, I am not getting much sleep at all. I actually have a CRICK in my neck from turning to look at the monitor every couple of minutes…I need someone to watch him sleep!!! L So, what we are going to start in this coming month is, he is going to be placed on the KETOGENIC DIET which has been known to help with stopping seizures. So, they will take him off of his current G-TUBE formula (peptimum, jr) to a KETO-CAL formula. I read up on it and basically, it is a LOW-CARB diet…I THINK we will be admitted into the hospital for a couple of days…NC Baptist I think…and if he does well on this, then HOPEFULLY the seizures will have stopped, maybe some meds taken off and all will be well..PLEASE JESUS, let it all go WELL!!!! But other than that, he is doing AMAZING!!! He is in 1st grade now and he is getting SOOO BIG! He is so smart too. I love when he talks to us or he tries really hard to tell us something. And the BEST thing that came out of his seizures is that he is EATING ORALLY LIKE A CHAMP! Yep, my little boy is LOVING eating. He wakes up and signs EAT and he eats breakfast, lunch and dinner. And I am talking he EATS not just nibbles. Could be why he has gained so much weight!! He is now 42 lbs!!! he is getting HEAVY! But he is such a cutie and he is getting so strong. Unfortunately, with these recent seizures, he has had some weakness now that is causing him to be MORE LOW TONED….i just pray that he gets his strength back SOON!!! He loves his brothers and loves to challenge them! He is SOMETHING else when he gets MAD at one of them. He will sit there and YELL at them if they are having issues. So cute!!! That is our little boy!!

And then there is JOSHUA who is now 3 years old. Wow, this little boy is SOMETHING else. I love him SOOO MUCH but he is the 3rd child…he is the one that gets into EVERYTHING…and he is currently into the terrible 2 at 3! He favorite word is NO or UH-HU…and he is a little con artist cause he will say in a whiny voice’no alex, stop’ and I will catch him saying that and alex is across the room or something and alex is like, I am not even touching you!!! So, he tries to get brother in trouble all the time. He is also very LOUD…he loves to sing but LOUDLY, he loves to play but play LOUDLY…my ears are usually ringing by the end of the day. But he LOVES to play with alex and he love to tease matthew. Such a CUTIE!!!

Well, james is doing very good. He is at a new unit here in san Antonio so that means that we are STAYING in san Antonio!! J either way I would have been happy but now especially with Matthews seizures, I am so glad we are staying here..we are hoping that he gets his promotion soon so then we can start looking for a new home…he finished PHASE 2 of his BNOC school….we REALLY need a one story house….matthew is getting soooooo heavy and with his recent seizures, he is almost too weak to go up the stairs on his own and we have to carry him and he is HEAVY!!! Anyway, james is doing well and he is gearing up for HUNTING SEASON. Yep, let the shooting begin! One of his favorite sports! He started TODAY at his new job and it is at CAMP BULLIS now so a bit closer than where he was at before. I feel sad for him because his whole unit before is now all scattered around TEXAS …they were sooo close. I know they will stay friends but no longer work together….

As for me, well, so-so…I am ALIVE and I am BLESSED so I really shouldn’t complain. But since my surgery back in feb 2010, my body has not been the same…I have been back and forth to the doctors and surgeons trying to find out WHY I am continue to have gastro issues…I have had colonoscopies, blood work, scopes, etc and they still don’t’ know what is going on. I wonder if they injured something while they did the surgery…anyway, I just wanted it FIX cause it is LIFE ALTERING what I am going thru…my fibro is kicking my butt too, but again, with all the stress of the surgery and now with matthew seizures, my little body is going nuts! J

But THANK YOU GOD, our little family is doing well. We have started up on our school year again and we are enjoying doing classes. Waiting for the HOLIDAYS to come. It is just around the corner now!!!! We take one day at a time and we take our evenings very seriously. We have tried to keep matthew to a strict in bed time of 8:30 to make sure he gets plenty of sleep. So needless to say, we are ALL on a schedule now. We tend to notice if we have had a LONG day, he will end up with a seizure!!

So, we hope this letter finds everyone doing AMAZING and well. We ask PLEASE if you can please pray for our little boy, MATTHEW that his seizures resolve and he has them NO MORE. I am so sad for him because now with all these meds, he is not the same little boy…he is really tired all the time and GRUMPY!! GOD WILLING these seizure meds GO AWAY!!!

Thanks again, everyone!! until next time, TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS!!!

James, Maria, Alex, Matthew, & Joshua

Thursday, August 26, 2010

we are up to 6....

unfortunatly, the seizures are back...we are up to 6 szs now in just under 2 months...that is WAY WAY WAY up from 2 seizures in OVER TWO YEARS....i am so sad about my baby boy matthew...he had a sleep study done on tuesday night. their thought is that maybe he is having apnea episodes which in turn are causing him to have seizures?! we shall see how he did in his sleep study. all i want to know is WHY?!?! now i need to be very clear about this, it is not 'why him, God?" i don't THINK i have ever thought that, even when he was born with a heart defect. i love my son JUST THE WAY HE IS and i am very BLESSED to have him with us!! i am asking 'WHY is he having seizures again?' how can i HELP him...what is the cause so that we can try to fix it....that is the WHY i am thinking and can i help my little man...what is going on?! anyway, he had another sz last night...2 in poor little guy!! he slept thru them but he remained on oxygen all night long and he seemed to sleep very well...

i am praying that SOMETHING comes up that will explain why he is having these sz...

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

need to get back to blogging....

yep, it has been a LONG TIME since i really have been up to date on my seems to get in the way of it....but really, there is really no reason...FACEBOOK is my new favorite place to post stuff but why i do it there and not here, well, i don't know! i SHOULD do it more often here because this is forever and facbook just keeps rolling by....

sooo, life has been boys are all doing wonderful, THANK YOU GOD...we are getting ready to start our school...maybe next week?! we have all our curriculum, THANK YOU GOD and alex is ready to get going...i am just ready to get started back on our schedule...I LOVE HOMESCHOOLING and yestereday, i joined the NORTH WEST HOMESCHOOL EDUCATORS and i am really excited! field trips, tons of fellowship for me AND the i am excited...just need my history and science book and that should be this week! :)

wow, our pool is GREEN!! YUCKY! yep, after our birthday party on the 1st, with all the kiddos jumping in after playing hard and sweating all day, it just killed the pool!!! :( and since james is gone for 2 weeks, who gets to clean it up?! ME!! OH WELL...i just hope i can do it...i am PRAYING that today's treatment is IT...if not, it is dumping the water and doing it again...sign...pools are sooo much work but so much fun..

Tuesday, August 10, 2010



My baby boy Alex is 8 years old! Wow, we have been SOOO BLESSED with this little boy…THANK YOU GOD for this little boy. What a blessing he is in our family. I can’t believe he is now 8 years old. He is such a happy little boy. Always ready to help us whenever we ask and SO polite! He is the best big brother ever. Always helping out with the boys and being so calm and helping so much with his baby brothers. With matthew, he is always willing to help me with getting whatever I need…medical wise, wow, this little boy is amazing when it comes to drs appts for matthew. Being WONDERFUL there at the different appts and when matthew is in the hospital, he does great there. He has unfortunately had to witness several of matthew’s massive seizures and he has great at getting me the phone to call 911 and going downstairs to open the door for EMS….just such a BRAVE little boy! so proud of him! And for Joshua, he LOVES his baby brother and he LOVES playing with him. Finally, someone who he can play with and run around with and Joshua looks up to him…Joshua follows him everywhere! So cute…wants to do whatever Alex does! And so smart…he is now in the 3rd grade and he loves being homeschooled. He does so well in all his studies and just keeps amazing me on his memory of everything and what he learns. He ‘gets’ it quickly. He needs little if any help with his studies. He usually does it all on his own, only asking for help if he just doesn’t get it. So proud of him. And his belief in God is just amazing to watch. He loves learning all about HIM and he loves that our homeschool curriculum is based on our faith of Catholicism. He probably knows more than we do about it! And such a sponge when it comes to something he loves. And just loves his LEGO’s and his WII games. He is also just amazing when it comes to a computer. Since the age of 4, he has been able to get on, get to where he wants to go and play and get online like a pro! And he sits there and watches YOUTUBE and learns how to make LEGO’s figures and ships and such. Wow, his creations are just amazing.

Our son, Alex…what a BLESSING given to us from GOD. Back when we didn’t know if we could ever carry a baby to full term, here he was. He is our RIPLEY’s BELIEVE IT OR NOT baby (if you want to read his story…GO HERE) and with his pregnancy, daddy was gone for ALL 9 MONTHS because 9/11 had just happened and james was activated to Texarkana!!! But he made it for the birth of our FIRST BABY BOY…BLESSINGS…

SO, to end this, THANK YOU GOD for blessing us with this beautiful baby boy and THANK YOU GOD for every beautiful second that we have had with him…HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JAMES ALEX II!!!! WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

Tuesday, August 03, 2010

MATTHEW had a sz last night...

‎*yawn*long, i was just talking to my TAPVR friends about what it felt like 4 him to have a sz in middle of night & have to leave ur other kids..and it happened. that was so scary! but we r HOME & he looks good..i can't believe his O2 sats got into the 30'S & his lips turned BLUE! that was the FIRST time i personally had EVER had to BAG my boy!! they always did it in the ambulance but there was NO WAY i could wait! to see him not responding, O2 monitor going crazy, sats in the 40's & 30"s and knowing you have to BA...G HIM or he is going pass out or worst...that was really SCARY! Thank GOD i had his airway bag set up pinned to the wall above his oxygen and it was complete (thanks to METHODIST & our last hospital stay where i took the bag from the room) and i hooked it up and put it on, that was a crazy rush...i say that because so many emotions are going thru your body and then i had james call 9-1-1 and then we switched and i had to get his diastat in him ASAP....(valium to help stop his sz)...he sz for 25 mins that we actually saw him plus how ever long he sz before his monitor went off...scary!!
but, these sz are really different than the other ones....he seems to be responding to the DIASTAT with these so, i think we are going to NOT call EMS until after his diastat and he is STILL szing...the DIASTAT has seem to i think i will give the DIASTAT after 3 him with oxygen and watch him...after another 5 mins if he is still not responding or still szing, i will call EMS...the decisions i have to make for my never think you would make THOSE kinds of decisions for anyone you love....but thru my FAITH and thru PRAYERS he and WE have come a long way...THANK YOU GOD FOR MY BOY!!!

thanks all for any thoughts and prayers...we are going to take it EASY today...and did i mention that my dh is leaving for 2 weeks this saturday?!?!? yep, going to be STRESSful the next 2 weeks on my own and with his sz....**sigh**

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Prepping for tomorrow

Such a PAIN in my BUTT!!! I have a colonoscopy tomorrow and the prep for it sucks!!!:((((( but, God willing it will get me fixed up.... Just have not been the same since my surgery back in feb....going to be a LONGnight!!! Can't wait to EAT something tomorrow....haven't eatena thing in over 24 hours now.... Can just TASTE a burger and fries right Now.....yummy!

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Jelly stone rv resort

Awwwwww......loving this new camp ground here near canyon lake....the boys love that it is yogi bear! They have activities everyday for the kids....can't wait to explore the place tomorrow....James noticed that there are TONS of familiies here and it is very clean and nice! We are here for a couple of days....

Wednesday, July 07, 2010

Am enjoying my vacation with my family!

We left yesterday and have enjoyed being together away from the house... We are staying at the hawthorn inn and it is a beautiful room! Today we went to the USS lexington and had a yummy dinner at Blackbeards and now just cruising around looking at the beach...

Friday, June 11, 2010

Dad's Rosary...

today, we had my dad's was very nice and to hear nice things from those of his co-workers at the seemed that he still worked at his church lighting the candles at the TABERNACLE...that is sooo AWESOME to hear...

Sunday, June 06, 2010

My dad passed away today...

well, we got the call at 9am....we were in church and when i got out and looked at my phone i had a message fromt he hospice place...when i called over there, they said my dad had passed away unexpectedly at 8:55am...i say unexpectendly because hospice can usually tell the family and give them a couple of HOURS before they think the pt will pass away...there are certain signs...well, my dad had a GREAT Blood pressure at 7:30 in the morning....the dr was making his rounds and before he could make it there, a nurses aid walked in to his room to check on my dad and he had just suddenly passed away....i am sad that there was no one there to be with him BUT i was also happy that the ONE thing that i had wanted (for him to see me again, to meet his grandkids, to hear himself called GRANDPA and to hear me tell him that i loved him and he told me he loved me) happened...i am AT PEACE as i know that he was too...he saw all his brothers (except one and one sister that was too ill to travel) and he saw NUMEROUS neices/nephews, cousins that came to see him...that was important to ME and i know it was to him too...he had lived a very solitary life after he and my mom divorced...he had not only distanced himself from ME but from ALL his familyl....

sooo, REST IN PEACE, matter what, I LOVE YOU and will MISS you as always...i am glad we got to RECONNECT before you passed away and i will have no regrets....GOD BLESS....

Friday, June 04, 2010


well, today, a priest from his parish came over and gave my dad his last was a BEAUTIFUL prayer service for him...he had a brother, sister, a niece, son, daughter (me), and several kids there to be with him at his was really nice and we prayed over him and we were each able to give him a was really really nice....

we were there for about 3 hours and then my brother and my family went to go eat dinner...very nice...i had realized that that was the 3rd 'last rites' i had been MOM, my son MATTHEW and now my dad....wowowowow....

Thursday, June 03, 2010

My brother came home today...

i picked him up from the airport and we went straight to see dad at the hospice center....we had 2 of the 3 kids with us so it was nice....they did GREAT and dad opened his eyes and say my brother and he met his 2 grandkids....he smiled when he saw them....that was nice and the boys said hi to him and touched his hand...

my brother was able to say hello to him and he acknowledged him and everything...he was able to see my bro and my brother could talked to was really hard to understand him and he was really restless....his oxygen was not in his nose and apparently he didn't like it there at all...well no wonder, they had it at 10lts with NO HUMIDIFICATION!!!!!! i told them they needed to get some on him! that is PAINFUL!! i cant' even imagine how uncomfy that must have been...

anyway, all is well...we went to his house and my brother went in to see how things were....and he had good neighbors that came out as soon as my brother showed up to talk to him....that was much to DOOOOO!!!!!!!

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

My dad was moved...

today to the hospice facility....i am sooooooo happy he agreed to go there...i know they will take good care of him....i passed along the word...

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Went to see my dad...

well, THANK YOU GOD i was able to go see him....if we had been there even 15 mins later, we would not have been able to TALK to him...but instead, i was able to talk to him and show him his grandkids pics (he has never met them)...he saw me and talked to me and didn't reject me, TAHAN KYOU GOD....after about 15 mins, they had to medicate him because he was breathing soooo fast and was hard to watch...after that, he dosed off and was finally breathing comfortably...stayed with him for about an hour then went to mass with my aunt and then came back for little bit i was leaving...i kissed him and told him that i loved him...he opened his eyes and told me 'i love you too'....

i am at peace...i pray that his family comes to see him....i know that it would bring him PEACE...and also peace to those of his family....everyone has been estranged so i PRAY that everyone can just go and see him....he will be the first of the brothers & sisters to pass away when it happens....

my thoughts and prayers go with him....

Monday, May 31, 2010


THANK YOU to all the MILITARY NEAR AND FAR for your services especially to all my family and friends that have served in the miliatry!! my beautiful HUBBY that we are soooooo proud to support and LOVE!!! THANK YOU, BABE!!!

onto my dad...well, i got a phone call from HOSPICE that told me that my dad had cancer in his stomach and liver....he does not have many days to live!! wowow...very hard to hear....but he was threatening to leave and go HOME but there is no one to take care of him!!! i can only PRAY TO GOD that he realizes that and he can go to a facility that will care for him....wowow...i am so sad and am in shock....

Saturday, May 29, 2010

got a call from the hospital...

and my dad had been moved to the MICU after being transfered down to the 2nd floor from SICU then back up to the 3rd floor MICU because he was having issues with respiratory and also HR issue...i made the calls to the family and i just keep praying for him....

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Found out my dad...

was in the hospital and had abdominal surgery....

my Tia, his siter, called me today and asked me if i could please help her find my dad...i had not spoken to him in over 10 years....but of course, i told her i would call the hospitals to see if i can find him....and i metropolitan SICU because he had had abdominal surgery....well, we shall see what happens....i just pray he is ok....when i called to see how he was, i had to tell the nurse that i was estranged from my father and she said, hold on....then she came back and said she had to ask him if it was ok to talk to me and he said yes....and she just told me what had happened....i called my aunt and let her know...

Saturday, May 22, 2010


yep...over a YEAR it has been since he has had ANY sz activity and TODAY, the day after his birthday he MUST have had one...why do i say MUST and not DID? well, because it was unwitnessed....he woke up early today (again) at about 4:30am and dad took him to the potty and put him back in bed...everything was fine...then he wanted the tv on so he put him back in bed and the tv on left about 5:30am and i had gone in to check out matthew cause he was coughing but he was fine....then i went back to sleep and so did him...well, later this morning i went in because he was coughing...and he was semi awake...he rolled over and sat up and just sat there swaying with his eyes closed....wierd...i got him over to the couch and he is just laying on me and just out...i keep trying to wake him up and move him so i went and gave him his meds and he is just asleep on the couch....and then he started refluxing and then would fall back to sleep and he would wake up and relfux and then fall back to sleep and everytime he woke up, he never looked me in the eye or he never really woke was REALLY concerning me and ieven called james and had him try to wake him up or talk to him and matthew had NO EXPRESSION which is odd because he LOVES his daddy and he usually goes CRAZY with was REALLY REALLY REALLY scary...i just KNEW something was up when i woke him up...he was just not MATTHEW....and i finally had to call a nurse/dr to see what i should do...he FINALLY woke up at 1245 and he was till really dazed and not having any muscle control...and then 10 mins later he FINALLY started to interact with me...THANK YOU GOD...the dr and i think he DID have a SZ in the morning...i am so was soooo scary....and of course, it was just me and the boys....

i hope this is not the start of has been over 1 year since his last one...we will be on alert now AGAIN...that is so get really comfy and then he just likes to shake us up a bit!! oh well...thank GOD he is ok....

Friday, May 21, 2010



Matthew Isaiah turned 6 years old today! What a blessing it is and such a miracle. I know that most people when their kids have a birthday, they are so happy and think back over the last year. Some people, like us, view each day and YEAR as MIRACLES given to us from GOD. Most of you probably know our sons miracle story, so I will only BRIEFLY give you some of what happened those early days of his little life. Our son was born after WONDERFUL 39 weeks of being in my body. It has always been such a blessing for me to carry my babies for 39 weeks. I KNOW how it is to lose babies before they are ready to be born. So, when we were pregnant with Matthew, we felt so blessed and happy, just ready for our baby. Our pregnancy was as perfect as the first pregnancy. We eagerly awaited his arrival and planned his c-section to happen on May 21, 2004. Wow, we were so excited and ready. On that morning, we got wheeled into the OR ready to have our baby and at 8:54am, our son MATTHEW ISAIAH was born…he was beautiful…he gave a CRY…they took him away to clean him up and as they were putting me under to finish me up, I heard someone say, “he is not changing color’…I didn’t know what that meant…until a nurse came into my recovery cubical and said, ‘where is Mr. Gonzalez? Your baby has a heart defect & serious lung damage and needs to be transferred NOW” and walked out. The next couple of hours were every parents NIGHTMARE…knowing that EVERYTHING was out of your control and you were given a prognosis from the pedi cardiologist that he “didn’t think he would make the transport” he was that critical…that your newborn baby was at a different hospital from me, the mommy and that he was undergoing emergency heart cath and open heart surgery at 8 hours old because they found out that he had a rare heart defect called TOTAL ANOMALOUS PULMONARY VENOUS RETURN (TAPVR)…unless you have been thru this, you have absolutely NO IDEA what we were thinking or feeling…I can’t even TELL you what kind of thoughts were going thru our head. All we could do is PRAY and ask others to PRAY for our son…and they DID…we had sooo much support and sooo many PRAYERS for this little boy from all over the world…I remember being given a private room when there were NO PRIVATE ROOMS on the post partum floor…and KNOWING that that happened because they felt things were not going to go well…I remember TRYING to use a pump to express milk and crying because I didn’t LIKE to use those !@#$$ pumps and HAVING to….and just praying and waiting for the phone calls from James to let me know how things were going during his surgery….and being told that it was SUPPOSE to be a 4 hour surgery but instead, because of excess bleeding, he had to go thru the surgery AGAIN to stop the bleeding and it took a total of 8 hours…of being wheeled into the PICU on a vent and the ECMO machine…a VERY sick little boy….the prognosis of UNKNOWN….of him being taken off ECMO at 5 days old and told that there was a 1% chance of survival (and that was being nice) because he was blue again…the color of purple/blue color…of watching and KNOWING that your beautiful baby boy could be GONE by the days’ end….of finally being able to hold your baby boy…of loving on him, talking to him and just PRAYING over him…and the memories continue to be BRIGHT and STRONG in my mind….we witnessed a MIRACLE that day when by the GRACE OF GOD, he DID NOT pass away like EVERYONE thought…that by the GRACE OF GOD, he continued to survive, defy and to PROVE every doctor wrong that because of that, doctors couldn’t GIVE me a prognosis for him because they NEVER knew what Matthew would DO! 98 days in the PICU….98 days of him fighting for his life and him DAZZLING the staff with his beautiful smile and spirit….

And THAT is our son MATTHEW….that is this little boys FIGHTING spirit. He has been just such an INSPIRATION for our family. He reminds us everyday of how PRECIOUS life is and how MIRACLES happen. We always have said that Matthew must have seen GOD because this little boy is so HAPPY all the time. That is how we explain his beautiful and happy spirit. He has already SEEN such a HEAVEN and that has made him always to have such a BEAUTIFUL smile. RARELY has he been bad tempered or unhappy…when he is, we know that SOMETHING is wrong or he is feeling ill.

Right now, at 6 years old, this little boy has been thru things that NOBODY should ever have to go thru. This little guy has been in an ambulance, being transferred CODE 3, while being bagged and intubated due to having had a massive seizure lasting sometimes over 2 hours, over 10 times in his little life. He has been taken by AIR AMBULANCE (helicopter) 2 times due to the same as above!!!! He gets pounded on by a CPT vest machine for 2 times a day everyday while getting a nebulizer treatment due to his chronic lung disease. And if he is also ill because of respiratory infection (which he gets sick often), then he might have to get the treatment every 2 to 4 hours thru out the day, be on oxygen and then get suctioned sometimes down his nose to TRY to help him get all the crude out of his lungs. And while I am doing this, I am having to HOLD HIM DOWN, because he is kicking and crying thru it all and just making your heart hurt because you KNOW it is just so MUCH for this little boy. But after it is all said and done, he will sit up and smile. Our son….he is just such an AMAZING little boy with sooo much strength and such a SPIRIT. And THANK YOU GOD, he is so STUBBORN! It is a blessing…he sleeps with an oxygen monitor on him every night and we are always listening for alarms to go off.

But beyond his illness, he is learning so MUCH. He is g-tube fed but he can eat, and when he WANTS to orally eat, boy, he can go to TOWN! We LOVE watching him eat food and munch and ASK for food. He may only eat as much as a 6 month old, but every spoonful and bite is just such a BLESSING. Some days he surprises us by eating FOUR chicken nuggets!!! Yep, that is our boy. And talking, well, that is definitely still a struggle for him. He has low tone and apraxia which causes him to have a very difficult time with his speech (and eating too). But he is working hard on it. He does have a communication device that he is using more and more to communicate with us. He amazes his teacher & therapist every time. We are so proud of him! He also knows so many SIGNS. Unfortunately, because of his low tone and lack of coordination, he has a harder time MAKING the signs. But he tries so hard and when WE make the signs, he knows what we are saying. In school, he is doing AMAZING and is progressing along very well. He is cognitively there and is so SMART! He loves to mess with the teachers and play with them. He loves to make them laugh!

And walking, well he is on his way. He can crawl up the stairs on his own. He can walk up & down the stairs if we hold one hand and he holds the banister with the other. Slow and steady he gets there. He can pull himself to stand on almost any surface. He learned how to pull himself up from the floor to stand using a kitchen COUNTER. And WHAT was he reaching for when he got up there and WHY did he want to do that?! Well, because my IPHONE was sitting on the counter and he wanted it! And he got it too! We have to be careful now because he will watch us from the living room to see where we set it down and if we are not careful, well, he will be making TONS of phone calls! Several of James buddies know that if they get called and no one response to the hello, that it is probably Matthew and they start to talk to him!! Awwww….in therapy, he has learned to use a walker without ANY SUPPORTS or STRAPS on him…just him and a walker in front of him walking all over the place there!!! Just amazing! He is progressing well with that area and we just need to keep pushing him. As long as he wears his AFO’s on his feet he does well. Just progressing nicely in this area. I hope he DOES learn to walk because he is getting HEAVY. He is solid!

Our son Matthew…what a JOY and how PROUD we are of him. He brings a smile to our faces with just a look. He LOVES his brothers and they love him. And daddy, well, you can just IMAGINE the love he has for him!!! It is ALL about DADA! That is ok. Not many people are as BLESSED as we are with Matthew….to have such a SPECIAL child in their lives, IS a BLESSING. I look back some days at when he was born and remember thinking, wondering, knowing that his FIFTH day, he would leave this earth and our arms…and PLEASE don’t think that we gave UP on him, because that did not happen. What we did was we GAVE HIM UP TO GOD and we told God that whatever HE decided, we would understand and LOVE HIM…but we were PRAYING soooooooo hard that THAT was not GOD’s plans for him. And PRAYING so hard that he be HEALED and asking others for those prayers. We could NEVER imagine that we would be parents to a special needs child. But we always knew that God had BLESSED us with Matthew and that Thru God, we know that He will always help Matthew and help US in all that there is to do. There is no fear or any sadness in our hearts for ANYTHING having to do with Matthew. To us, he is a normal child and we treat him as such. Of course he has limitations and we work around everything, but we LOVE to go traveling and go places and everywhere WE go HE goes!!

And HERE WE ARE…our beautiful MIRACLE MATTHEW ISAIAH has turned 6 YEARS OLD. Every DAY, hour, minute, second of his life has been precious and a blessing to us. We couldn’t imagine a day without our Matthew with us and PRAY we never have to! We know that we were VERY BLESSED that God left him with us. We KNOW THIS. That is why we are ALWAYS THANKFUL TO GOD!!

So, that I have probably caused those that didn’t need glasses to need some, I will finish with a couple of montages that I made. The first one is a picture montage of our MAKE A WISH TRIP (I know a YEAR late!!) and the 2nd one is all about Matthew!! And you will see that the first part is probably familiar because it IS! We NEVER want to forget what a miracle he is….but the 2nd part is more updated pictures of him up 6 years old. We hope you enjoy it!!



THANK YOU ALL for all the thoughts and prayers for this little boy thru out the years....we have been so BLESSED to have ya'll in our lives. GOD BLESS!!


The Gonzalez family

Sunday, May 09, 2010

being a mom....

has been the most important thing in my life....who knew that i would have 3 BEAUTIFUL BABY BOYS! i would have never had imagine this being my life and how BLESSED i would feel IN IT! THANK YOU GOD for blessing me with these boys....they are so unique and special in their own way....Alex is just something else...such a SMARTY and JUST LIKE ME!! we butt heads all the time because we are both sooooo STUBBORN! but still, just the smartest most loving little boy in the world!! and then there is little miracle...who is such a SPECIAL little boy who God has intrusted into my hands....He must have seen something in me to bless me with him....just such a JOY and such LOVE comes from this little boy..wowowowow....and then there is baby 'mama's boy'....he is just so cute and funny and always wanting to give hugs and kisses...he is the little boy that surprised us with his presences....we thought we were thru at 2 and then GOd blessed us with him...such a JOY and such a CUTIE!

THANK YOU GOD for my babies.....i pray always that HE GUIDE me in ALL that i do ESPECIALLY in how i RAISE my babies....

here are 2 poems that i LOVE!!! the first one is for ALL mom's and the 2nd one is for mom's of SPECIAL NEEDS...ENJOY!

When God Created Mums

by Erma Bombeck

When the good Lord was creating mothers, He was into his sixth day of overtime when an angel appeared and said, "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."

And the Lord said, "Have you read the specifications on this order?

She has to be completely washable, but not plastic, have 180 moveable parts, all replaceable, run on black tea and leftovers, have a lap that disappears when she stands up, a kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointing love affair and six pairs of hands."

The angel shook her head slowly and said, "Six pairs of hands? No way!"

"It's not the hands that are causing me the trouble," said the Lord. "It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have."

"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel.

The Lord nodded, "One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, "What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't but what she has to know. And of course, the ones in front that can look at a child when he gets himself in trouble and say, "I understand and I love you" without so much as uttering a word."

"Lord," said the angel, touching his sleeve gently.

"Go to bed, tomorrow is another ...."

"I can't." said the Lord.

"I'm so close now. Already I have one who heals herself when she's sick, can feed a family of six on half a kilo of mince and can get a nine-year-old to stand under a shower."

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly.

"It's too soft," she sighed.

"But tough," the Lord said excitedly.

"You cannot imagine what this mother can do or endure"

"Can it think?"

"Not only think, but it can reason and compromise," said the creator.

Finally the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek.

"There's a leak," she pronounced.

"It's not a leak." said the Lord. "It's a tear."

"What's it for?"

"It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness and pride."

"You're a genius," said the angel

The Lord looked sombre and said "I didn't put it there."

The Special Mother
by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice,
a few by social pressure and a couple by habit.
This year nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children.
Did you ever wonder how these mothers are chosen?
Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth
Selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation.
As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.
"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint, Matthew."
"Forrest, Marjorie, daughter. Patron Saint, Celia."
"Rutledge, Carrie, twins. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."
Finally he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a handicapped child."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who knows no laughter?
That would be cruel."
"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair.
Once the shock and resentment wear off she'll handle it."
"I watched her today.
She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of it's own.
She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive.
Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.
She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.
She will never take for granted a spoken word.
She will never consider a step ordinary.
When her child says momma for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.
I will permit her to see clearly the things I see--ignorance, cruelty,
prejudice--and allow her to rise above them.
She will never be alone.
I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life
Because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air. God smiles.
"A mirror will suffice."

Tuesday, May 04, 2010


Hola everyone...i hope everyone is doing amazing....well, I am writing to everyone i know for some prayers please for The Mireles Family....They are my relatives that are in DESPERATE need of some prayers. On 4/30/10, my cousin David's 15 year old son had a VERY bad accident and he is currently in critical condition in the hospital....He has had surgery and is in a drug induced coma on a ventilator..of course you can just imagine what they all must be going, i am asking for them, if you could please send out some positive thoughts and prayers for this little boy who is in a fight for his life......He is in for a VERY VERY long road of recovery....prayers for the Family that is anxiously waiting for him to get healed and home where he belongs.....this is every parents worst is a website set up so that people can get some info on Dylan... We all know that PRAYER WORKS and that we personally have seen how prayers can bring about a miracle.....soooo, please, any THOUGHTS and PRAYERS for Dylan and his family would be apprecaited GREATLY!!! and please, pass it along to other prayer warriors out there!! "GOD IS GOOD!!"

Thank you sooo much!! TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS!!!
"Thru God, All things are POSSIBLE..." Matthew 19:26

Saturday, May 01, 2010

First Communion!!! :)

My beautiful son made his 1st communion today at PRICE OF PEACE CATHOLIC CHURCH!! we are SOOOO PROUD of him....he has study HARD for the last 2 years and has really matured in his religous life! a mommy and daddy could not be more PROUD of him...he knows more than US most times!!!

we also had a little party for him and it was nice to see family and friends around us....everyone was so awesome to come! THANK YOU!!!

Thursday, March 11, 2010


HOLA!!! i have wanted to post this for a while but just have not had the time to do here it is!! there a alot of things that i have found for myself and my family that are CATHOLIC BASED...sooo...i just wanted to SHARE...

i am CATHOLIC and i homeschool my kiddos and this year, we used a NEW curriculum that is CATHOLIC BASED and it is AMAZING!!! i, personally, am LEARNING alongside my 7 year old, my FAITH!!! what an AMAZING is from CATHOLIC HERITAGE it is just a GREAT learning tool for my kids!! WE are learnign soooo much!!

i also discovered a CATHOLIC HOMESCHOOLERS TOOLBAR that i just installed that is VERY NICE and has some GREAT links to use while i homeschool!! LOVE IT! it is called CATHOLIC GADGET and you can find it HERE. I JUST got it and i already LOVE IT!! :) has a NICE list of blogs from families that are catholic and HOMESCHOOL!!

then there is the purchasing place called AUTOM and it is an ONLINE and CATALOG place to buy ALL things Catholic!!! i mean, there prices are AMAZING and they have the BEST stuff!!! LOVE IT!! my MIL bought my beautiful BIBLE stand there and it is AMAZING!! we have also bought other things there...very nice place to get ideas too!

ok...then i have a IPHONE...and i am HAPPY to say i LOVE LOVE LOVE my IPHONE!!! yes, i said it! best phone EVER!! i have SEVERAL applications that i LOVE....i have 3 that i have that are becoming INVALUBLE to me as a theY are AND YOU CAN GET THEM OFF ITUNES!!

IMISSAL...if you are Catholic and have an IPHONE, it is a MUST have! why?! well, it is the MISSAL for mass every sunday! in church, i probably get some looks cause i am following the READING right off my phone as they are read in mass....EXACTLY...i can read them before hand and during the also has prayers, bible verses, and other Catholic related stuff...i LOVE IT!!!!!

if you look CATHOLIC in ITUNES and you should find something that says PRAYERS, 1000+ CATHOLIC PRAYERS ($.99) by SURGEWORKS, INC....i found this YESTERDAY and i am LOVING all the novenas, prayers, daily prayers, prayers to saints, Acts and soooo much more!!! just AMAZING!!! i can't wait to use it when i need a quick pick me up and to help my boys learn their prayers!! LOVE IT!

HOLY BIBLE by YOU VERSION on itunes is just AMAZING!!! it keeps the WHOLE bible at my fingertips! and the GREAT plus to this is that i started one of the programs so that i can read the bible in a YEAR!!! and i got to chose WHICH bible version i wanted, which i chose the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE...and the program i started was the CANONICAL style...and it has a certain read for every day...and if you keep up with it, you should finish your bible in a YEAR!! never done that before so i am EXCITED!! i love that i can just take a moment in my day, whip out my phone and start reading my bible for the day!! LOVE IT!! :)

CATHOLICTV was something i downloaded yesterday and i am not sure about it....but basically, you can WATCH CATHOLIC TV programs like the Mass being said, Rosaries being said, other do need to be connect to a WI-FI to watch the videos but i figure if i am home i can do that too...pretty neat little gadget...havent tried it out yet though!

soooo, that is it! for now...but i am so excited about family and i are coming more together as we learn about our FAITH with Alex being homeschooled using a Catholic curriculum....LOVE IT!

i hope ya'll enjoy and GET YOU SOME!!! BLESSINGS TO ALL!!

Wednesday, March 10, 2010


well, i have been diagnosed with COLITIS and i am NOT HAPPY!! :( it has been what has caused i think my recovery from my surgery to go soooooooooo slow!! i am either HAPPY or MISERABLE due to my tummy...really no in between! and a week ago, i TRIED taking some antibiotics that my dr prescribed for me and i was SOOOOO NAUSEATED, i couldn't stand it and i stopped taking it....then tuesday, he put me on a NEW medication called VANCOMYOCIN and it is a formulary medication and the last ditch effort before....i have to be admitted into the hospital to be treated there....and i SURE don't need or WANT that!!!! soooo, even though this stuff is NASTY, i am doing well on it and taking it and NO NAUSEA!! :) i have to take it every 6 hours for 10 days....i WILL DO IT!! so far so good....i just want to END all of this and keep moving FORWARD...i am still having signs of reflux but i think it has more to do with all this COLITIS stuff than real tummy is just not the same right now! :( anyway, all could be WORST so i am VERY BLESSED!!! i had a MISERABLE day on monday night/tuesday....i was up on monday night from 1000pm all the way to 4am on the toilet and slept in a CHAIR next to the bathroom...MISERABLE! AND then tuesday, i was just BEAT...i felt HORRIBLE..adn then i had to go to the dr and that was when he gave me the new med....i PRAY this helps...A WONDERFUL friend of mine prayed for me/with me on tuesday and i KNOW that is what helped me....i have been forgetting to PRAY for MYSELF! i pray for others but rarely for myself....and when i do, they are answered...i just need to remember MYSELF!!!

anyway, i will continue to PRAY that this COLITIS resolves itself and i get back on track....eating wise, i am doing AMAZING...can basically eat anything just have to chew it VERY VERY THOUROUGLY...if i don't, man, it HURTS!! AND it is SCARY cause you can FEEL your food STUCK in your throat and not going anywhere...and you can FEEL it SLLLLIIIDDDDIIIINNNGGGGG down your throat...not a confortable feels like a BIG ROCK going down....and there is NOTHING you can do but wait for it to go i have LEARNED to take it!

Saturday, February 20, 2010

boy, that surgery was HORRIBLE!!! :(

well, i had my surgery on WED FEB 17 and it was....HORRIBLE!!! :( i have had 3 c-sections and this takes the CAKE!!! well, i had a 5 HOUR surgery and then one hour AFTER trying to wake me UP!! the way it was explained was that my HAITAL HERNIA was the size of a mans fist, then my stomache went THRU the hernia into my CHEST above my they had to PULL my tummy out of my chest, FIX the hernia with some WIRE MESH, then REDO my NISSEN WRAP and then ANCHOR my stomache down so that it doesn't go back UP into my chest by placing a GTUBE for 6 weeks ....yep...not good at ALL!!! and then i am on a LIQUID DIET for about 4-6 weeks!! YUMMY!!! and trust me, if i EAT anything that is toooooo big, IT HURTS and it just STICKS in my throat and just SLIDES realllly slow until FINALLY it goes down....not a good could take up to 5 mins to go DOWN!!! i was sooooooo miserable after i had surgery while in the hospital...i spent over 24 hours in ICU because i had a collapsed lung and fluid AROUND my lungs (plura effusion) and i was in SOOOO MUCH CHEST PAIN!! MISSERABLE!! and then, about 5 hours before i went to the 7th floor, they brought in someone that had an ARM TRANSPLANT and her room had to be at 80 DEGREES and because our rooms shared a thermastat, MY ROOM WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOO HOT!!! man, it was REALLY bad....and then when i went up to the floor, i was just sooooo miserable...YUCKY!! it was not a good stay...and my FIBRO was kicking my BUTT and those beds were NOT comfy and my back and my chest....and up until the DAY i got out, i could only have 60cc of WATER every 6 hours...yes 60CC!!! that is like NOTHING!! until right before i left...CRAZY! and i could catch my breath and i was just yUCKY YUCKY YUCKY! i could go on and on....bBUT BUT BUT BUT....IT COULD ALWAYS BE WORST!!! sooooo, I AM BLESSED!!!!! BLESSED!!! BLESSED!!! THANK YOU GOD!!! :)

Thursday, February 11, 2010

MATTHEW is in the hospital.....and other news...


i hope everyone is doing WONDERFUL and enjoying their 2nd month of the year!! as for us, well, we are doing fine....i tell you, i hope we are getting all the 'bad' stuff out of the way EARLY in the year so that the rest of the year would be sssmmmoooottthhhh sailing!!! :)

i just wanted to send out an update.....i know, 2 in 2 months...well, matthew is in the hospital right now....he was admitted yesterday due to a rash ALL OVER that started last week....i am sooooo THANKFUL that we have such a WONDERFUL dr that didn't just blow off his symptoms like most drs would have and instead decided that after seeing him 2 days (mon/wed) that he needed to be admitted cause he was not getting better....they diagnosed him with KAWASAKI SYNDROME....his cardiologist said we needed to play the lottery cause him have TAPVR (rare CHD) and now this (which is also very rare) is just unheard of!! only matthew would say DIFFERENT!!! soooo, this is the earliest diagnosis (we were 72 hours into it) she has ever made so that is a GREAT AND AMAZING thing!! it dropped his chances for an anuerism to 2% or sooo...THANK YOU GOD! they are treating it with IVIG and HIGH DOES OF ASPRIN (5 baby asprins every 6 hours)...they started his IVIG and asprin last night....i am just praying that he responds to it...he has been so miserable now for a couple of days....he didn't ever look like matthew... i had only heard it because JET TRAVOLTA had it when he was 3 and i remember when he died, the mother said that THAT was what caused his death (which was NOT true)...anyway, if you google it is says that young kids get it (which is why it is soooo rare for matthew) and that it imight be caused by cleaning your carpets...not is actually your body fighting itself because there is a virus in it...not a good does effect the heart, which scared me SILLY!!! and plenty of fluid....he is finally looking a LITTLE can see pics on facebook...he was soooo swollen and red all over....just so you know, the symptoms are ALL OVER RASH, FEVER FOR 5 DAYS, LIPS-SWOLLEN, RED AND CRACKED, EYES-RED (RACCON EYES BUT RED) AND THE WHITES ARE RED TOO (KINDA CREEPY LOOKING), FEET/HANDS- SWOLLEN AND RED, TONGUE- LOOKS LIKE A STRAWBERRY (BRIGHT RED AND HIS TASTE BUDS WHITE) AND SWOLLEN LYMPH NODES(he did NOT have that yet) she was reading the signs/symptoms, i just kept nodding........his face just look HORRIBLE!! at first we thought it was a rxn to one of his drugs and we were AFRAID that it would be on of his SZ meds and that would have BAD cause he is on such a 'perfect' mix and dose right now that i sure didn't want to mess with it!!! and neither did his nuerologist! anyway, GOD WILLING we will be getting out of here this was funny cause his pedi dr said laughingly, 'well, good news is that there is no holidays this weekend!!" and i had to remind him that valentines day was on sunday and then presidents day was on monday!! he just GROANED!! if you remember, matthew is NOTORIOUS for having 'drama' on holidays or on vacations....just last month he was dx with RSV (i don't think i mentioned that before) on NEW YEARS EVE.....only MATTHEW!!! :) soooo, any prayers or good thoughts would be REALLY appreciated....

as for the OTHER news for the month...i am going to be having surgery next week (17th)...yep, they decided that i needed to have my stomach corrected after all....they think my nissen is fine BUT apparently, all my GERD/reflux symptoms i had been having since i had joshua were because i had a hiatal hernia and my nissen/stomach went THRU it and is now sitting above my diaphram!!!!! so, THAT is why i am having such a time with my reflux/'s getting SQUISHED by my diaphram every time i BREATH!! FIGURES! :) soooo, they are going to pull down my stomach to where it is suppose to be, anchore it with a GTUBE (yes, matthew and i are going to be TWINS cause we will BOTH have feeding tubes) then fix up the hiatal hernia!! now, the gtube is just temporary (about a month) so that my stomache will adhere to the wall there where the gtube...then they will take it out and it will close up and my stomache SHOULD never move from that place again and go back UP! :) i know, WIERD!!! i guess i can say the same thing as i said about matthew....ONLY YOU, MARIA, THIS WILL HAPPEN TO! :) but hey, maybe they can do a little lypo/tummy tuck when they are in there?!?!? i will have to ask the drs about that!! ok...i think the WORST thing about this whole surgery is that i am going to be on a FULL LIQUID DIET for about 3 weeks....i did this 10 years ago when i had the nissen and it was hard then, i can't imagine how hard it is going to be NOW that i have 3 kids!!!!!! the crazy thng is that you can't ''cheat" like any other know, grab a pinch of food here, a bite there...nope, if i did that, i could CHOKE to death!! my esophagus will be so swollen, it will not let anything but liquid thru!! so, instead, i will be eating applesauce, jello, pudding, broth with no noodles or anything, and ensure for 3 weeks....YYYYUUUUMMMMYYYY!!!! james says he will be on the diet WITH me...i give him 2 days before he caves!!! i am just wanting this to be done and over of my aunts jokingly asked 'what are you giving up for LENT? SOLIDS?" which i thought was sooo funny! i had actually not realized that i would be having surgery ON ASH WED!! who knew?! it has got to be a good day since it is a HOLY day of obligation! :) i need to make sure i get some ashes from somewhere after my surgery....i just MIGHT give up solids for 40 days and nights...maybe....of course, my luck,you would think that i would lose ALLLL this weight and i end up gaining it or something....i NEED to lose some...i hope that is an ADDED benefit!! ;)

anyway, my other 2 boys are doing WONDERFUL....alex is doing great in his class...he is just sooooo smart! :) he amazed me the other day (every day) when he asked what SUDUKO was...i showed him what the concept was and that was IT, he figured it out and started working on a puzzle IMMEDIATLY!!! it took me FOREVER to figure out WHAT i was suppose to do!!!!!!! and i am so proud...his math, he is doing GREAT! he is adding/subtracting/borrowing/carrying over up to the 100's and working on the 1000's! and again, i didn't have to really teach him anything...just showed him what to do one time and he was OFFF!!!! :) love it! and GOD WILLING, this year in May, he will be making his FIRST COMMUNION and we are sooooo excited and happy!!! :) big boy...and this week, he started his first HOMESCHOOL PE CLASS and boy, he LOVED IT!! there are about 13 kids in it and she made them do laps, jumping jacks, sprints, jump rope etc and he said he had a BLAST! he was sooo worried about the week after i had my surgery and who was going to take him cause he didn't want to miss! i told him that i would take him...he LOVED IT!

and joshua...really, what can i say...he is such a CUTIE, and such a SMARTY...i love when he talks and tells me 'love you', and just huggs and loves on me...he is still a mama's boy and i am LOVING IT! ;) he is still a little bully!!! he will go up to matthew and wrestle him DOWN!! and we have to be VERY careful cause he and matthew fight alllll the time! and i mean FIGHT....i tell you, in a former life, i don't know WHO joshua was....maybe a soldier or something cause he knows how to 'shoot' a rifle and gun (even with sticks and such), he can box and fight, wants to play with KNIFES, SCISSORS & FIRE and he LOVES to play all kinds of sports...scary!!! just the other day, we had SUCH a scare cause i had left my pill box in my purse and he got a hold of it and took a couple of bites of my PILLS!!!!! CAN YOU SAY OMG! how scary?! we had to take him to the ER per poison control cause i didn't know how many he had taken....but THANK GOD, everything was just fine...IF he actually had any, it was really sure taught me a BIG lesson that i guess i had forgot or just was not as watchful but after this, i am looking at EVERYTHING around him to make sure he can't hurt himself...again, ONLY JOSHUA!!!

and james is doing great...such a AMAZING hubby and daddy! he is working HARD and just being recognized for it...we are sooo proud of him....he is getting ready for the BIG move....he is trying to find his soldiers other places to move them to (other battalions)'s alot of work...not to mention that HE has to find a job himself!!!! :) but again, that is my MAN!!! love him...he and i celebrated our 13th wedding anniversary on 2/1/ has been 13 years of BLISS....i have always been soooo THANKFUL to GOD and felt soooo BLESSED that GOD brought him into my life...he is just an amazing daddy and husband....not many would be able to go thru what we have gone thru (with matthew) and still be around....not many would LOVINGLY, WILLINGLY learn everything they have to do so that their children would be healthy and happy...he is something else! THANK YOU GOD!

anyway, sorry to 'talk' your eyes off....i really just meant to talk to you about matthew but i thought i would throw everything else in...i would appreciate ANY thoughts and prayers for our beautiful son MATTHEW....he has been thru soooo much in his life...and in the last month and a half, he has had to deal with RSV, tons of treatments, suctioning and steroids and now THIS!!! i just pray that there are no lasting effects from this....

and if you can spare a thought for me, i would also appreciate any thoughts and prayers for me for next week when i have my surgery...i worry about my boys and leaving them for a couple of days....again, i am just so THANKFUL that james is a GREAT father that i KNOW they will be taken care of WAY beyond anything! and for all those weeks on the liquid diet...YIKES!!!

ANYWAY, take care and GOD BLESS....i will be updating on matthew on FACEBOOK and i will try to do on my BLOG too ( ....if you are on FACEBOOK and want me to add you to my 'friend', just email me with your info and i will look for you on FB...apparently, you can TRY to look for me but there are SOOOOOO many ME's out there, you can't find me!!! :)



Friday, January 01, 2010



we hope that the last decade has been AMAZING for everyone and that 2009 was just as wonderful! i know it has been a VERY VERY LONG TIME since i have updated ya'll on our family so i thought this would be a great time to do it!! :)

WELL, this was something i posted on my FACEBOOK so i thought i would share it here too:

HAPPY NEW YEARS! well, this decade brought MANY changes to my life one of which is MOTHERHOOD, having the most PERFECT babies ('02, '04, '07), THANK YOU brough to me the most PURE and LOVING knowledge that MY GOD IS AN AWESOME GOD and THRU HIM, ALL THINGS ARE POSSIBLE...GOD showed us a MIRACLE when he blessed us with MATTHEW and how AMAZING the power of PRAYER is...also, bring many new people in my life because of our Miracle baby, Matthew, who we would have NEVER had in our lives...nurse, doctors, therapist, new friends, just so many...

THANK YOU GOD for a WONDERFUL DECADE and an AMAZING 2009! on with the NEW...I WILL EMBRACE this year with all that YOU give me, knowing that i am LOVED and am BLESSED ... because i have the most important thing....GOD IN MY LIFE......

and that is just a FRACTION of what the last decade and year has been like....James and I started our family in the 2000's and what a BLESSING that has been in our lives.....

well, Alex has been doing great...he is 7!!! :) although right now, he is SICK as are ALL of us...not the way i wanted to start the new year...other than that, he is doing GREAT at his 2nd grade schooling...we are still homeschooling and he is loving every minute of it...much better this year than last when he kept TESTING me....he is such a smarty and loves to figure out things...i am hoping to get him started on SOMETHING that will having him doing some fun stuff/learning with others...maybe a sport or maybe something academic...not sure what he would love to do...if there was a CLASS on LEGOS, STAR WARS OR WII i know he would be in his element!! :) but other than that, he has found his new best friend...his baby brother josh...they are forever playing together and since baby brother totally looks up to big brother, it is a plus...he copies everythign that alex does!!! he follows him everywhere....and with matthew, well, it is definetly a test of patients when it is matthew turn at the WII and matthew loves to push the home button and drive big brother a bit crazy!!! but he loves his brother matthew and loves to just mess with him!! :) WONDERFUL big brother!

Matthew is doing fine...when he is not SICK like right this minute!!! unfortunatly, this new years brought him much illness....right now, we are doing our BEST not to let him get put in the hopsital...we just found out YESTERDAY that he has RSV....not good with his chronic lung is that ONE dx that we ALWAYS were worried if he got...soooo SCARY!!...he looks and feels really bad and is currently on oxygen, 2 antibiotics, neb treatments every 3 hours and oral steroids and a SHOT of ROSEFIN at the ER yesterday....he is barely keep his o2 sats up but he is working hard at it...poor baby....we had to dust off our oxygen equipment, it had been that long since he had been on it!! but, right now it is touch and go...he is a really sick little boy that the dr is PRAYING will stay out of that are we!! but, onto other things, he has been doing wonderful in his kidergarden homebound class....his teach is AMAZING and he is really learning with her! he loves class time and she is teaching him SIGN!!! LOVE it!! and then his speech therapist thru the school is also amazing..he loves MS P and loves when it is time for her to come over...they are working on his talker and he is doing great!! my little man! he is also doing great in his PT/OT!!! he is sooooo close to walking now with his independent walker...he is making big strides in that department!! as for sickies, that has also been a blessing EXCEPT for tummy bugs...he has had 2 and that has really thrown his schedule off and now with RSV, well, he is doing pretty bad right now...anyway, he loves to torment his baby brother josh and loves to mess with alex...typical 5 year old!!!

well, onto our 2 year old....JOSHUA...well, what can i say....he is that little boy that has done EVERYTHING the other 2 boys NEVER have done...bite, hit, kick, jump off furniture, eat bugs, throw tantrums, not listen, and the list goes ON AND ON AND ON!!! ! OK, he is going to give me the GREY HAIRS!!! it is really funny cause it is soooooooo much 'josh, no' josh stop, etc etc...that is all you hear and he is not afraid of ANYTHING!!! he is really something....but he is sooo loving on top of that and loves to get hugs and kisses and loves to cuddle....he LOVES to follow big brother ALEX around and repeat and do EVERTHING he does....his Godfather (a police officer) asked us who taught him how to 'pretend' shoot a gun/shotgun...he is soooooo acurate on how he places his hands and how he looks down a site, it is SCARY!!!!!!! and he has been doing this since he was about a year old!! i sometimes wonder what he did in another life?!?!?! and then he is also a PRO with balls of anykind and has been since a baby! he throws a ball right at you, no matter what size, and FAR TOO and he can hit a baseball thrown at him with a bat, no matter how SMALL the ball is and how thin the bat is!!!! he can throw a basket ball in from FAR AWAY and make it and he is just a sports fiend!!! we know he will be our athletic kiddo!! he loves to TORMENT his big brother MATT and they are ALWAYS FIGHTING!!! santa had to bring them almost the EXACT SAME THING cause he knew if one had something, the other wanted that same one!!! boy, we have to keep them apart most days cause all you hear is one or the other crying or yelling!!!! anyway, he is doing GREAT!!

as for james, he is doing great too! his battalion at work is going away!! so, he is going to be getting a new position SOMEWHERE in the state of texas...we don't know what the future will bring our way or where we will be stationed but we SHOULD know by sept when it has 'J' out...but other than that, he is doing AMAZING and being in love with his boys...he can't seem to get enough of them!! :) he has enjoyed this last year home and we just pray every day that it doesn't come down that it is his 'turn' again....

as for me , well, i am doing GREAT!!!! other than having been dealing with my FIBROMYALGIA AND GERD this year, all is well. i have had many test, CT scans, MRI's, endoscopies and am currently on meds for all the has been a bit stress full cause it has really escalated and i have been in pain for something everyday but it is starting to become unbearable where i need to take meds....and my GERD is back and they told me that my NISSENFUNDIPLICATION had slipped and that was why i was having so much gastro, right now, i am treating it with meds for as long as that works...we shall see what happens after that...i am just happy that FINALLY, i am being seen by a GASTRO DR and a RHEUMOTOLOGIST too!!! finally MEEEEE!! :) ANYWAY, all is going well, enjoying being with family and homeschooling! trying to get my clutter in order....when i find the time....loving my family...

if you keep up with our BLOG ( and have noticed a LACK of content recently, it is that i am now ADDICTED (there i said it) to FACEBOOK!!! YES, facebook is such an AMAZING place to reconnect with family, friends and finding old friends.....i love the GAMES that you can play on it and just the posting of everyday is a FREE website that lets you is not FLASHY like MYSPACE, no crazy music or anything, it is just a posting board where you can post 'what you are doing' and others can comment and see what is going on..with this being my 20th anniv since i graduated from high school, i have reconnected with MANY MANY friends from highschool that i had not talked to SINCE high school!!! :) and family, some that i don't ever talk to unless there is a wedding or funeral, i get to 'chat' with and keep in contact with all the time now!! it is nice to see what family and friends are doing....sooo, if you have NOT gotten a FACEBOOK ACCOUNT (, come on over and look me up!! you can find me with this email address OR under my FULL NAME...i would love to connect with everyone!!

well, that is it...the FIRST LLLOOOONNNNGGGG email from me for the new year! you know you missed my letters!! ;) i have missed it too! it has been too long since i connected with everyone!! i will TRY to keep them coming!! i will try to post some pics of the kids on my blog next week and also, if you find me on FB, you can see some there too!! (hint hint!)

ok, FROM OUR FAMILY TO YOURS, HAPPY THANKSGIVING, MERRY CHRISTMAS & HAPPY NEW YEARS and all the other HOLIDAYS that go in between!!! we know we are soooo BLESSED to have each adn everyone of you out there!!! WE LOVE YA!!! MANY BLESSING to you and your families for the coming year!!!!!!