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Matthew's MAKE-A-WISH TRIP!

Matthew's MAKE-A-WISH TRIP!
Wishes DO come true...our FAMILY in FLORIDA!! :)

Monday, June 25, 2007

well, this weekend was interesting....

we had a nice quiet weekend.....it was REALLY NICE to relax and not worry about who was coming or where we were going....there was just one thing we needed to do and that was go to a b-day party for matthew's little friend and that was on sat...that was really nice.! we had a GREAT TIME. but other than that, it was just relaxing. now more than ever, this PG has been wearing me out!! it has been really hard to sleep. my FIBRO has been REALLY acting up....i am SOOOOOO EXHAUSTED and just really weary....my back is KILLING me and so is my siatic nerve....it is just so painful. and having to carry matthew up and down the stairs is getting really hard. but i keep doing it. my dr said that up to 40 lbs is ok....matthew is 33lbs but he is SOLID!!

WELL, matthew had his FIRST aquatic PT thereapy on friday! it was sooooo cute to watch him in the pool! he was SOOO TIRED before we got there. he was ready to go to sleep and was really fussy, then we got him in the pool and BAMM, just like that he was having a BLAST! it was sooooa wesome to see him. his PT was really impressed because he went right to work and was sooooo social (this was only the 2nd time she saw him!) and there he was in the pool with her and doing everything from kicking and swiming to walking up the ramp etc. you would nevere know that he had just been fussy and trying to fall asleep on us! then OT decided to get in and do their therapy in the pool too so ended up being in there for 1 1/2 hours!!! can you believe that? and then of course we CRASHED as soon as we got home! i wish i could have got some pics of him but there was another pt there in the pool. maybe this week?!?!?!

this sun he had another sz...it lasted about 3 mins and it was facial. it always scares me when he has one and i am by myself. what do i do with alex? that is such a delima if i have to got by EMS because i can't take alex with me!!! sooooo, i haven't figured that out yet and I PRAY TO GOD i never have to find out!! i just keep praying to GOD that he does not have any more szs!!

well, alex is doing sooooo good! i am so proud of him! he is such a good brother and son. i couldn't ask for anything BETTER! i just gaze at him and love him love him LOVE HIM!!! he is such a CUTIE!!! he loves his playdates with his cuz and he LOVES running around and getting into EVERYTHING!! he is REALLY MISSING DADDY though.....i am so sad that he does NOT want to turn 5 and does NOT want to have a party!!! and he gets REALLY UPSET if i bring it up! so what we are going to do is have a "playdate" the tue before his birthday and just invite his little buddies and then just have a 'casual' party without him knowing it. and if anyone gets a gift, i will take it and put it away until his actual birthday....

matthew is doing well. he is getting SOOOOOO BIG and just developing and growing. he is really loving standing and walking. he is also learning his shapes and sorting etc. we are REALLY working on words and shapes etc. he is also wanting to play with other kids. it is SOOOO CUTE!! AND AND AND we got the BEST NEWS in the world today.....the specialist called to say that HE DOES NOT NEED A PACEMAKER! YYYIIIPPPPEEEE THANK YOU GOD! he said we just have to be careful if ever he goes under anesthia and he had NO IDEA what happen with that heart block! so, although the month of his monitoring didn't turn up anything, he wasR EALLY SURPRISED BECAUSE OF THIS! but he was HAPPY that he did NOT need one! he said maybe in about 10 -15 years but right now....NOPE!!! THANK YOU GOD!

well, james is doing well. he has been gone for almost a MONTH!! hard to believe. he has started his training now so he is REALLY BUSY doing his training. he tries HARD not miss anything because he does NOT want to be nondeployable. if they miss training, they will be held back. now, that would be GREAT but but but, that would JUST mean that he would have to go with ANOTHER UNIT (who's duties might be house to house or something) instead of his unit!! sooooo, we SOOOOO WANT HIM NOT TO MISS ANYTHING!! i want him to deploy with his unit as he does because he KNOWS them and also the duty they are doing. he had to go to the ER on sat becaus he had a reaction to the small pox vaccine that he got along with all his other shots last weekend. he is now on antibiotics and benadryl. he was upset because they made him miss his hand to hand combat training. they are starting all of that....i just PRAY that he does well and that all GOES WELL!!

anyhway, it has been interesting. july will be a VERY BUSY MONTH for us, with more than 6 drs appts PLUS his 4 therapies a week we drive to.....it will be ok!

Thursday, June 21, 2007

therapy

hola! matthew just started some new REHAB therapy at a PLACE! they have been coming to our home since he came home from the hospital at 98 days old! we thought we would try going somewhere to GET therapy and so far so good! we will even do AQUATIC therapy too!! that is sooooooooooo exciting because he LOVES the water! i am soooo excited! and here is some video of him....

this video is of his FIRST tricycle ride at the new rehab place! he did GREAT!


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just another video!! i am soooo proud of him!

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anyway, the boys are doing GREAT!!! i am soooo proud of them....we did have a bit of a mishap on tuesday....my beautiful alex gave matthew a BLACK EYE!!! and oooohhhh boy, he got in TROUBLE! he is actually still in a bit of trouble from it. he basically poked matthew with a toy and caused him to CRY and to get a bruising on him eye lid and underneath....i felt SOOOO BAD for matthew and i was SOOOO MAD at alex!!! i cried right along matthew!!!! james just HAPPENED to be on the phone when it happen and he was soooo upset too! anyway, that was DEFINETLY something i will never forget!!

alex is having the hard time with james being gone....he tells me ALL THE TIME that he misses his daddy...sometimes he says he is MAD at him because he has to work away for A LONG TIME....i always sit down with him and remind him that daddy is working REALLY HARD and that he doesn't WANT to be away but he HAS to.....then he goes off and plays. we give LOTS of kisses from daddy and we just always say how much we LOVE HIM AND MISS HIM!!

well, we did a bit of going to the park today after haircuts and they had a REALLY GOOD TIME....here are a couple of pics of my boys...


Monday, June 18, 2007

matthew had THREE SIEZURES!!

yep, it has been a bit over a MONTH since his last siezure but today, WHILE I WAS AWAY AT MY DRS APPT, he had THREE over 5 min seizures while taking his nap! i felt sooooo helpless being at a drs appt while my baby was having his sz! he has a GREAT nurse that called me as soon as he started having them and i was able to talk to matthew the WHOLE TIME he had his 3 sz! i was REALLY certain that we were headed to the ER because with each sz, he just seemed to get more unresponsive....i think he missed me! we had left the house by 7:45a and we got back at 12:00 and his nurse told us that the WHOLE time he was calling for ME!! AWWWWW.....soooo, we got back and he gave me this BIG sleepy smile and started to talk and rub my tummy....my poor baby....i felt sooooo bad for him....i just got off the phone with his neurologist and he said that he thinks he is CLUSTERING (one BIG sz spread out) so we will have to give him DIASTAT after 3 mins no matter what now....wowowowow....i usually don't give it to him unless he is unresponsive for more than 3 mins....sooooo.......i just PRAY that it was FLUKE and maybe he was just tired?! GOD WILLING that is all. the drs said that something is coming up and THAT is why he had it (if you remember, everytime there is a SPECIAL event, he has sz (birthdays, holidays, vacations, etc) and he said 4TH OF JULY was coming up!!! YIKES!

anyway, james is doing fine. missing his family like we are missing HIM!!! he is soooo sad and upset that matthew had these sz. he was really worried about him. and he JUST found out that they leave SEPT 1, 2007!!!!! that is like 2 WEEKS earlier than we thought!!!!!!! SOOOOO, what does that mean for birth? i don't know. i am going to TRY to schedule it around 8/28 or so.....don't know how it will all come about. GOD WILLING it will be ok!! i am getting excited!

alex is REALLY ACTING OUT now. he is getting into soooo much trouble! he is really testing me! i just PRAY that he comes around. i know it is a BIG adjustment daddy not being here and all though he has been gone for 2 weeks before, it is DIFFERENT now because there is no DAY when he is coming back! usually i can put on the calendar, DADDY IS COMING BACK ON THIS DAY....now i can't....sooo, that is kinda bad. sooooo, i would HOPE that i get a date for him......

anyway, i am doing GREAT...baby G is doing really GOOD....very active and missing his daddy. i have gained my FIRST 2 LBS!! :) YAYAYAYAYAY.....i am soooo proud of myself for not having gained ANYTHING for the first 7 months of pg!! :) i had enough on me that i was NOT CONCERNED!!! soooo, everything went well....gestational test was great and i got my shot of rhogam (i am A-)....

anyway, we are doing well, and we have survived 2 weeks without dad. it has been REALLY nice to have been able to talk to him EVERYDAY!! THANK GOD! :)

well, we will be around.....just PRAY he does NOT have a sz.....

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

here is the video of JAMES from NBC...

VIDEO

i was SOOOO HAPPY to that my SIL found the video!! it shows james and our boys...and james is just CRYING.....please enjoy....

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

well, james left to EL PASO....




let me start by saying that i am sorry i have not been blogging as i have wanted to. it has been a VERY VERY VERY busy month now with james getting ready for deployement, matthews birthday, surgery & repeat surgery with hospital stay and scare of pacemaker....but i am now back!!

i will give a quick recap of what went on this weekend. this weekend was james FAREWELL CEREMONY at CAMP MABRY in austin texas and his unit is 2ND BATTALION, 131ST FIELD ARTILLERY. it was VERY EMOTIONAL. james has been gone since MONDAY 6/4 and we were SOOOO EXCITED that we were going to get to see him again!! well, my 2 boys, grandma and i left on SAT so that we could make sure we would get there on time for sundays ceremony. we spent the night there in austin at an EXTENDED STAY of america and it was REALLY NICE. anyway, we got up REALLY early because james wanted us to be there by 7am because there was suppose to be TONS of relatives there to watch. so we got there by 7:15am and thank GOD we did! we got GREAT PARKING and also front row for matthews wheelchair! it was REALLY NICE! the day was REALLY not too hot but it was really muggy and THANK GOD the sun was not officially up (until right before the ceremony started). well, as we pulled in, James saw us and called me on my phone. he was WAY OVER across the field in front of the buses. you could just see him waving at us! we were just sooo happy to be soooo close! so, we sat there at the bleachers waiting, we could see the troops marching in formation practicing for the upcoming ceremony. it made it soooo real. how can i explain the pride i felt or the emotions i was feeling seeing my husband WAY over there preparing to go to war? knowing that he will be away from us for a LONG TIME? knowing he will be missing so a YEAR of our life together and a YEAR of my kids life too? it was pretty emotional and all i can do is smile and wave at him so far way across a FIELD and soon to be a across the WORLD! i missed him ALREADY and he was right there across the field from me....anyway, as they got into formation there was FOUR group of soldiers...the band, then james group (smaller than the other) which was HEADQUATERS, and then alpha & bravo group which was REALLY LARGE (over 150 in each unit). they marched on field and i was SOOO PROUD.





i found out later after talking to james that when he started marching onto the field, he said that he looked at us and he just LOST IT. he told me, "babe, my eyes were not just tearing up, the tears were running down my face and snot and everything...lip quivering etc" he said that thru the whole ceremony, he would be ok until he saw us and then he would start to cry all over again (and he had a birdseye view of us). he got all of his buddies crying too!! my beautiful family man of a hubby...he will be MISSING his family sooooo much...i know that WE will be missing HIM BEYOND anything. so the ceremony continued with TONS of speakers etc....it was PRETTY EMOTIONAL ESPECIALLY when they retired the battalions flag. their flag has all these tassles that had all the wars they had been involved in or all the deployments they had been on since the unit was formed 1916 (THEY WERE CALLED THE LOST BATTALION) well, what they do is they roll up the flag and put a black sheath around it symbolizing that the unit is no longer in residence at their base camp...wow, that one got me REALLY GOOD...well, after the ceremony, the troops where let go to be with us the family....we were sooooo blessed because we got to be with james unitl 8pm!! :) very nice! well, where we were at, there was just the 4 of us and indi. then how we found each other, i will never know but first our sister-in-law INDI was there, then we saw our good friends JULIAN & SABRINA, then here comes TIO ZEKE, TIA CYNDI, KATIE, ANGIE, then INGLIS, TESSA, MARISSA, IAN, a friend, then MS TOLIVER & TERRI & then last but not least, SGT WANDER & HIS WIFE....there was 21 of our AWESOME family there. you can NEVER understand how WONDERFUL & AWESOME it was to see so many people there supporting james....i know that i was so TOUCHED and just so THANKFUL for them being there. all of them made the TIME and EFFORT to be there so early in the morning and make the trip from san antonio just to be there for james....words can't describe it. well, we were waiting for james and when he got there, he was CRYING and boy, it was soooo hard to see that. he was soooooo touched by his family & friends being there.....he told me he was very surprised and HONORED that they made it there.








we were able to all gather and talk to him and just hug and be hugged by james and it felt SOOOOOOOOO GOOD.....i got matthew out of his chair and he was holding both boys in in his arms and he was crying and just giving them kisses and it was just soooo beautiful and touching. a news crew came over and interviewed james and he was just crying and talking about how hard it was going to be leaving his family. (family in corpus christi saw the interview. we are still trying to see if we cand get a copy of it!!) well, afterwards, we walked over to the area where refreshments were given and it was REALLY NICE to be able to talk to james and the family. we stayed there for about an hour or so and just being surrounded by our family & friends was just the best. after we left, james, grandma, and my boys and i just hung out. we went to CABELLAS outdoors and just ate dinner there then we had to take him back to CAMP SWIFT. from there, we were AGAIN BLESSED because we got a treat and were able to take him home with us becuase he had his truck out there.





so, we had one more evening with him. we spent it at home enjoying eachother and he cried again because he tucked in the boys for the last time for a LONG TIME. the routine and all were so special to him...i can only IMAGINE what he must be feeling leaving him family, his boys behind.....not to have or take part in the nightime routine or EVERYDAY routine....my beautiful hubby....the next day, we had to drop him off at his unit by 11:30am and then he was off, back to CAMP SWIFT with his buddies. he actually LEFT for EL PASO (FT BLISS) at 1am this morning. he called me to let me know. wow, he is gone.....it is setting him that he is no longer here and won't be "coming home" soon or "around the corner". instead he is HUNDREDS of miles away but STILL IN TEXAS! that is a comfort. i just PRAY PRAY PRAY that they let him come home for the birth of JOSHUA MICHAEL. that would be such a BLESSING. we think it will be possible...i can't wait to schedule my C-SECTION so that he can let them know. i know that it will probably be an in and out kind of thing but to have him there would be a blessing....


anyway, so that was the ceremony. it has sank in that he will be gone for a couple of months. i COMFORT my self that i will GOD WILLING be able to see him AT LEAST in EL PASO before he leaves to IRAQ. they are suppose to get a 4 day pass but we have to go up there. i am DETERMINED to be there unless something MEDICALLY stops me! i can't WAIT TO SEE HIM AGAIN....it will be hard for the boys but i will do my BEST to keep them busy....

Sunday, June 03, 2007

James is leaving on monday.....

hello everyone!

we hope everyone is doing GREAT!! as for us, well, the day is here when our wonderful,beautiful husband and father will be leaving for a year.....i had gone by too fast but we are THANKFUL we have spent all our time together with him...it has been WONDERFUL just sharing everyday life with him.....it has been great but bittersweet....i LOVED watching him with his boys and just seeing the love they had for each other...i am just soaking it in and just PRAYING that we will have MANY MANY MORE.....he leaves on MONDAY JUNE 4TH and there will be a FAREWELL CERAMONY on JUNE 10TH in AUSTIN, TX @ 9am (anyone interested in attending, just email me back for more info) and then he flys out JUNE 12th to FT BLISS, EL PASO for 3 months.....from there they are scheduled to leave for IRAQ....total time, GOD WILLING will only be a year. here is his email if anyone is interested james.a.gonzalez@us.army.mil and as soon as i get an address i will send that out too!! still don't know what he will be doing over there but i just PRAY PRAY PRAY it will be administration type stuff!! alex asks everyday when daddy leaves for work if THIS is the day that he will be gone for a "long time" and everyday, i have told him that no, not yet....he has his calendar with the days marked but he is really worried about that day....GOD WILLING they months will FLY BY and we will be able to fill his days as best he can with playdates and just doing things to keep his mind off daddy.....and GOD WILLING we will be able to chat with james via the internet while he is gone......i just PRAY as i do for all troops, that he comes home healthy & safe.....we still don't know if he will make it for the birth but we are prepared either way!!

well, onto matthew, matthew is doing GREAT!! wowowow, what a difference the 2nd surgery made! even after one day, he was doing BETTER than after the first surgery. he JUST started to eat again orally so that is a GREAT THING. he is asking for food and wanting to eat and also drinking water. another thing we have noticed is that he is A LOT more vocal! he is saying MAMA all the time now and will say other words too! still drooling like crazy but GOD WILLING that will slow down. i just pray he continues on with his oral eating!! also, he NEVER had to take ANY MORE TYLENOL after the 2nd surgery! what a change from doing it RELIGIOUSLY the first week to not doing it AT ALL after his 2nd!! you KNOW the 2nd surgery fixed things up! he is also doing GREAT with his little heart monitor. it HAS gone off a couple of times but i don't know WHY or what it saw but i have NOT heard back from the cardiologist so i just pray that all is well. he went to the pediatricians for his well toddler check up on thursday and he is doing REMARKABLE! his weight and height is now AVERAGE (his weight use to be in the 97%) he weighed in at 33 lbs 4 oz and height of 37" !!! he is just getting SOOOOO BIG! he is also trying to crawl the RIGHT WAY over his hands and off his butt! much better! he is as HAPPY as ever and just such a JOY! he loves to rub my tummy and give BABY G a kiss and love. he is too cute! i KNOW he will be a GREAT BIG BROTHER!

alex is doing well also doing really well. he is getting so big! he has been acting out a bit but who can blame him when he UNDERSTANDS that daddy will be gone for a long time. that is his HERO and for him not to be here.....he has told me he DOES NOT want to turn 5 and that he does not want a party. he gets really teary eye if i mention it. i think it stems from him know daddy won't be there....so i am going to sneak in a party for him around his birthday and just tell him that we are going to have some friends over etc and just have a nice playdate.....nothing fancy just a day for him. GOD WILLING he will love it. i feel so sad for him because daddy is his daddy....he tells me all the time that HE CAME OUT OF DADDY'S TUMMY!! hehehehee....he just loves that man sooooo....

well, as for me, i am doing GREAT!!! I am 26 wks along and sure do feel pg now. i love to feel the baby kicking and squirming around there. i am measuring right on time and all the FETAL ECHOs we have had on baby G have shown that so far, it looks like everything is in the right place heart wise!! what a RELIEF!!! baby is also measuring at 1 lb 8 oz!! and he is DEFINETLY A BOY!!! soooooo, james and i have FINALLY come up with a name....i chose the first name and james the second and it is a COMBINATION of all 4 of our names (our initials)....the J will be for james & james alex II and the M will be for Maria (me) and Matthew....ready for his name??? his name will be

JOSHUA MICHAEL GONZALEZ

JOSHUA means - GOD IS MY SALVATION (matthews middle names means the same thing!!)
MICHAEL means - WHO IS LIKE GOD?

so there you have it....BABY G now has an official name!!! we are so excited! we have been buying some stuff for the baby because the month before i found out i was pg (dec) i SOLD EVERYTHING in a YARD SALE!!! so there you go! we bought the baby his stroller & car seat, his high chair & swing...we have also bought this little one some clothing and such. i laugh now because i had BAGS of baby boy stuff (and it was ALL in good condition) and it went all away at the garage sale!! so we are starting FRESH!! i still have the bassinet, play pen and crib (matthew is still in it) and a couple of other small things but basically everything else went bye-bye!! oh well! this little one doesn't get the hand me downs from his brothers!! little stinker! james wanted to be around to buy the stuff so this past week we have been on a BUYING FRENZY!! i can't wait to get it all set up! but we are sooo excited and happy! GOD WILLING i will get a date soon for my c-section so that we can let james comander know so MAYBE (praying really hard here) they will let him come home for that (he will be ft bliss)....

everyone had been soooo supportive here at home and i am SOOOO THANKFUL to them ALL! i am just BLESSED to have so many family and friends near by that are wonderful! i do worry about things but i TRY to be just upbeat and excited about things for the boys.....during the summer, my niece will be staying with us every other week so that will be a BIG HELP and i know we will have playdates for alex to keep him occupied too! there are also the free movies twice a week that we will be doing....just things to keep the boys busy!!

well, that is all for now....i pray everyone is doing GREAT!! i will keep everyone updated on us and also on james. please feel free to email him......i know he will appreciate hearing from people!!

well, TAKE CARE AND GOD BLESS!!!

love,
james, maria, alex, matthew & joshua michael!